Monday, April 29, 2013

What Did I Just Read?

I had the misfortune to read this lovely little article today about why everyone should not attempt suicide. This is the worst thing I have ever read in my life. Victim blaming someone who is suicidal is just going to make them feel worse. Way to go kid who wrote this article.  This was clearly written by somebody who has never been suicidal, nor dealt with anybody who is suicidal. 
The article
Wanna kill yourself? (Wanna is not a word. If the first word of your guilt tripping paragraph is misspelled how is anyone supposed to take this seriously?) Imagine this. You come home from school one day. (Not all suicidal people go to school. Idiot.) You’ve had yet another horrible day. You’re just ready to give up. So you go to your room, close the door, and take out that suicide note you’ve written and rewritten over and over and over. (Personally I have never written a suicide note. Not saying people don't,  but personally I have never written one.) You take out those razor blades, and cut for the very last time. (So everyone cuts themselves if they are feeling suicidal? WTF.) You grab that bottle of pills and take them all. Laying down, holding the letter to your chest, you close your eyes for the very last time.
A few hours later, your little brother knocks on your door to come tell you dinners ready. (I don't have a little brother so this is a bullshit scenario.)You don’t answer, so he walks in. All he sees is you laying on your bed, so he thinks you’re asleep. He tells your mum this. Your mum goes to your room to wake you up. (Why didn't the brother just try to wake you up? Why do we have to get the mom involved?)  She notices something is odd. She grabs the paper in your hand and reads it.
Sobbing, she tries to wake you up. She’s screaming your name.
Your brother, so confused, runs to go tell Dad that “Mummy is crying and sissy won’t wake up.” (Oh okay. So now every household has to have a mom and a dad not to mention a brother and a sister. COMPLETE normality.) 
Your dad runs to your room. He looks at your mum, crying, holding the letter to her chest, sitting next to your lifeless body. It hits him, what’s going on, and he screams. He screams and throws something at the wall. And then, falling to his knees, he starts to cry. (Because in the real world everything is exactly like a movie drama!) 
Your mum crawls over to him, and they sit there, holding each other, crying. (While the brother is watching wondering why the two parents are acting so strange. But I guess we are supposed to forget about the brother at this point.) The next day at school, there’s an announcement. The principal tells everyone about your suicide. It takes a few seconds for it to sink in, and once it does, everyone goes silent. Everyone blames themselves.
Your teachers think they were too hard on you. (That's THEIR JOB.) 
Those mean popular girls, they think of all the things they’ve said to you. (The popular girls are the only ones who can say mean things to people. Right. And we are supposed to somehow believe they felt bad about what they said.) 
That boy that used to tease you and call you names, he can’t help but hate himself for never telling you how beautiful you really are. (This is starting to sound like a crap piece of fanfiction.) 
Your ex boyfriend, the one that you told everything to, that broke up with you.He can’t handle it. He breaks down and starts crying, and runs out of the school. (Because every suicidal person has an ex boyfriend! And people can flee the school whenever they want!) 
Your friends? They’re sobbing too, wondering how they could never see that anything was wrong, wishing they could have helped you before it was too late. (About 52% of suicidal people don't have friends and are extremely lonely.) And your best friend? She’s in shock. She can’t believe it. She knew what you were going through, but she never thought it would get that bad… Bad enough for you to end it. (This sounds like a suck best friend.) She can’t cry, she can’t feel anything. She stands up, walks out of the classroom, and just sinks to the floor. Shaking, screaming, but no tears coming out. 
It’s a few days later, at your funeral. The whole town came. Everyone knew you, that girl with the bright smile and bubbly personality. (Where I live only 1,428 people live in this town and I STILL don't know everyone.) The one that was always there for them, the shoulder to cry on. Lots of people talk about all the good memories they had with you, there were a lot. 
Everyone’s crying, your little brother still doesn’t know you killed yourself, he’s too young. Your parents just said you died. It hurts him, a lot. You were his big sister, you were supposed to always be there for him. (Oh lovely, some more guilt tripping!) 
Your best friend, she stays strong through the entire service, but as soon as they start lowering your casket into the ground, she just loses it. She cries and cries and doesn’t stop for days. (You cannot cry for days. It is physically impossible.) 
It’s two years later. The whole school talks to a counsellor therapist at least once a week. Your teachers all quit their job. Those mean girls have eating disorders now.
That boy that used to tease you cuts himself.
Your ex boyfriend doesn’t know how to love any more and just sleeps around with girls.
Your friends all go into depression. Your best friend? She tried to kill herself. She didn’t succeed like you did, but she tried…your brother? He finally found out the truth about your death. He self harms, he cries at night, he does exactly what you did for years leading up to your suicide.
Your parents? Their marriage fell apart.
Your dad became a workaholic to distract himself from your death. (My dad is a workaholic now. I'm still here.) 
Your mum got diagnosed with depression and just lays in bed all day.
People care. You may not think so, but they do. Your choices don’t just effect you. They effect everyone.
Don’t end your life, you have so much to live for. Things can’t get better if you give up. I’m here for absolutely anyone that needs to talk, no matter who you are.
Even if we’ve NEVER talked before, I’m here for you.

This is ridiculous. I have attempted suicide in the past. I am not perfect. Whoever keeps posting this around, you should feel ashamed of yourself for making people feel guilty that they would want to die. Posting this will not prevent anyone from killing themselves for several reasons, one being that this is too freaking long for most people to read and sounds like it was written by a 13 year old. Two is because the person who is thinking about suicide feels pretty bad already and thinks that there is not much in life worth living for. This post is not going to make a difference. You want to know what makes a difference? Being NICE, reaching out, and talking to people. 
Guilt tripping is not the way to go. Blaming the victims is freaking stupid. A lot of people are probably mad that I am writing about this but I am tired of seeing this post hanging everywhere around the internet. You cannot save a life by posting anything like this. You can save a life by being a good person and by NOT spreading this chain-letter around. 

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