Tuesday, February 10, 2015

Parade in Concert

Or as an alternate title:
Why Is Life So Unfair To Me?
*Warning: Lots of profanities will be said.*

Just learned about an hour ago that this guy who I used to go to high school with is going to be in a Broadway show for one night in the chorus. He get's to go to the Lincoln Center to perform Parade. Now this wouldn't piss me off so much if it wasn't this punk ass bastard. This guy used to make fun of me for being in drama class. When I was one of the only two people in my school who was in Hamlet he told me that I was was probably the only one who auditioned because Shakespeare sucks and they were probably lacking female talent. He was also on my soccer team and started screaming at me one day in front of our entire team, the opposing team, and soccer watchers because I didn't do the cool down because I had rehearsal and "rehearsal is stupid and isn't as important as soccer" and "You must hate your team and everyone here if you really leave them at the very end of a difficult game to go to play practice."  Oh and fyi, running at an extremely fast pace back and forth across the field after we lost a game should not have been called a cool down, it should be called mega stupid.
He also made it pretty clear that he hated choir considering he only joined the class to get an "easy A." And to quote him about the "drama nerds" (his words, not mine); "Theatre is stupid because none of it is real." 
So yes, I can totally see why this jerk get's to be on Broadway. Oh! And it gets even better! Come to find out, he has only been in theatre for year at Southwestern Michigan University! Because as the old saying goes, when you do theatre for only a year you usually get to end up on Broadway! AAAAHHH! I AM SO FURIOUS RIGHT NOW! Like, you can join theatre whether you're 12 or 212, theatre has no age limit. But when you get to perform on Broadway after only a year of being on stage that just doesn't seem right to me and makes me incredibly sad. And then it makes me enraged. Yes, you can be fantastic after only two days of stage work, but for those of us who have been performing since they were 3 years of age, it's a kick in the stomach to watch people like this get the lead in a show or go to Broadway.  Yes, I will admit to being jealous. I will also admit to having a mental breakdown and crying for a few hours after the news that this undeserving miscreant get's to be singing one of the most powerful musicals in NYC while I sit here in nowheresville Michigan trying to book any role for any play/musical that I can. And lately I have struck out because my life sucks and luck is never on my side.
Plus this was at the LINCOLN CENTER. You know what else has just recently played at the Lincoln Center? Sweeney Todd. And you know who was in this version of Parade? Jeremy Jordan (loved him on SMASH. And in Newsies. And on the Bonnie&Clyde album.) Laura Benanti (I follow her on twitter and she's kind of the coolest. Plus she's a fantastic actress.) Katie Rose Clarke (I came THIS close to seeing her as Glinda in Wicked!)  and Ramin Karimloo (He's the most awesome person ever. If you don't like this guy then you have brain issues which need solving.)  And after finding out who was cast and where this was to be performed I asked myself; Why am I not dead yet? 

Monday, January 19, 2015


As probably very few of you may have heard, a wonderful woman and Russian singer (whose birth name was Olga Vital'evna Yakovleva but better known to the public by the name of  Origa) has passed away after battling lung cancer at the age of 44. That sucks and I really hope she is finding happiness in the afterlife, she deserves it. I am really sad to hear about her passing.

I feel like I needed to get that out there because a lot of you may have never heard of her and let me just tell you that she was an amazing singer. If you've ever watched the anime series called  Ghost in the Shell: Stand Alone Complex then you've probably heard her music as she sang both the first and second seasons theme song. Also, if you've never seen the series I recommend giving it a watch as well. Origa was actually the reason I started watching the series. This was the only show I've ever started watching because I thought the intro song was great. Lol.  I honestly just thought her voice was amazingly beautiful. I swear I downloaded at least 20 of her songs and put the on my ipod the same day I heard "Rise." And I will continue to stand by and say that it was the best musical decision I have ever made. 

Sadly I never had a chance to see her perform live, but I do want to thank her for the wonderful music. I have never and probably never will hear anything like it ever again. Phenomenally fantastic talent Origa was. =)

But Origa also had a lot of great songs outside of the anime/Final Fantasy world as well. Granted, you probably won't be able to buy her cds for under $50 or so here in the U.S. but if you are interest in listening to her music there is always itunes and Youtube. =)

 I thought it would be a good idea to post some of my favorite songs of hers below because I want to keep the music alive even if the fantastic singer is no longer with us.


Inner Universe

Ame (Rain)

We Can Hear Your Pulse




On an ending note I would like to say that the Ghost in the Shell movie that Hollywood is making better make a dedication to Origa or at least play her songs somewhere in the movie because that is the very least of what she deserves. Because I swear if they don't play any of her music and start playing something by Kanye West for God knows what reason, I am seriously going to lose it. 

Thursday, January 1, 2015

Stupid Parties Celebrating Yearly Stupidness

Halfway into January 1st and we learn that the evil blonde girl who got the lead in a theatre production and acted like a huge diva is now engaged. Not only is she engaged but she got engaged five minutes after midnight at a theatre party which I wasn't invited to and just learned about. Seriously, this is the email that was apparently sent out;

">Name of the college's theatre< is looking forward to a small New Year's gathering with some very important Acting Class alums from back in the day this evening!" 

Well gee golly! Considering I took the very first class with this adjunct professor (who is now the director of the college's theatre department) you would think I'd be invited but NOPE. Kids who took the damn class five months ago were invited but not me! You know because nothing screams "back in the day" like recent class takers!!! I also did not enjoy the wording of "important acting class alums." I'm sorry, but is the reason I didn't get an invite to this festivity is because they didn't feel that I was important? Because if that's the case, they can all go to hell! But I'm guessing they just forgot about me (typical) or only wanted blondeys closest friends there to share in the proposal moment. But the last one is just a lame reason to throw a party and in my nonexistent heart I'd like to think better of these traitors. 

But I'm totally not bitter about this AT ALL. It's not like I didn't have things to do on New Year's. I was invited to plenty of small gatherings because I'm such a likable person. =P 

Wednesday, December 31, 2014

New Year's 2015!

So it's finally the end of the year. I hope 2015 is a magical year for everyone out there who is reading this. Hopefully this year will be better than 2014 because 2014 was kind of abominable for me.
I don't really have any new year's resolutions but I did start a bucket list which isn't completely organized yet. But once I organize it I may post it on this blog just for fun.

I have also been slacking in the blogging department and that is not cool or fair to the people who still read this so that will be a resolution; blog more. Even if it's only five words I'm going to start blogging stuff again. I still have about 10 or so entries I haven't finished yet but you can bet they'll be posted in 2015.

Once again a very happy New Year's to everyone!!!!

Sunday, November 23, 2014

Halloween Goodies 2014

This Halloween I was fortunate enough to try some newly introduced 2014 sugary sweet Halloween candies and sugar stuff and wanted to review them all on my blog like every single other person does during this season!

Franken Berry cereal- I do believe that I am the last person on earth to ever try this cereal. It has been around for years but for some reason I always went for the Count Chocula and could care less about the Boo Berry or Franken Berry. I am really disappointed in my review of this because I did expect to really enjoy it a lot! It's pink and it has marshmallows and is strawberry! But this year I picked up a box and can honestly say that I will probably never pick up another box again. I know that is the most un-Halloween thing to say and most people would not dare diss the Monster cereals of the season, but I just could not get into Frankenberry. It tasted very artificial. That's the only term I can come up with for this, strawberry artificial cereal. I still have half a box left so maybe I will eventually change my mind, but it's not looking too good for Mr. Franken.

Chobani Pumpkin Spice- I dig Chobani yogurt. I also dig Yoplait. I really like both of them equally. Chobani actually had pumpkin as one of the ingredients in the yogurt so that's pretty neat considering most pumpkin spice things usually don't have any trace of pumpkin in the ingredients what so ever. It was pretty good although I think I'll stick with straight up orange yogurt from now until the end of time.

Hershey's Candy Corn Bars- I love candy corn and I love white chocolate. What could possibly be better than combining the two together in a small Hershey bar of deliciousness?!?!? I hate to say it but I was not a huge fan. It tasted very waxy and was overly sweet and WAXY. SO MUCH WAX. I couldn't really taste the white chocolate because the sweetness of the sugar and wax overpowered the chocolate in my mouth! I'm glad I tried this but if I was anyone else I would skip this and pick up a bag of real candy corn, preferably the Brach's version.

Starburst Candy Corn- This was probably my least favorite out of all the candies that I tried. It just tasted like fruity wax which is actually a big improvement over the candy corn bars. Stick to Easter, Starburst.

Candy Apple M&M's- Note to readers; these are CANDY apple not CARAMEL apple as I thought they would be after biting into one. These tasted pretty sweet and apple-y. Not terrible but not the best either.

Pumpkin Spice M&M's- These are an ok M&M but they are definitely not my favorite. I'm not sure how I would describe the flavor but "pumpkin spice" would not be it. These M&Ms are probably the fattest M&Ms I've ever seen in my life, but in this case the quantity does not match the quality considering these are pretty meh.

Candy Corn M&Ms- These were the best and if they don't sell them next Halloween I will throw a fit. Apparently you can even make cookies with them! I shall have to try that recipe and report back!

Pumpkin Spice Hershey's Kisses- At first I really didn't like these. But after trying a few a second time I realized that they aren't half bad. Two thumbs up for the Kisses!
Caramel Apple Oreos- Good ole Oreo and their craaaazy flavor varieties! These cookies are brown and lime green colored in the middle aka caramel apple colored and they have a pretty good taste. I would add the cookie part to it though because the cream on it's own just didn't do it for me. 

Caramel Apple Milky Way- These are the best things ever created and if you don't agree then you are absolutely wrong. They are soooo good! You need to try some. Right now. Go to the store, pick up a bag and love them. If you don't love them give them to me because you are undeserving of such a lovely thing.

Sunday, October 12, 2014


Three. That's how many wedding invitations I received in the mail today. I like weddings, (drinks all around!) don't get me wrong but you know, it would be nice to actually BE in a wedding and not sit in the audience with a fake smile plastered on my face while watching the brides family members cry over their daughters white gown of holy matrimony. I am there for cake. I am happy for you but really, cake is the only reason I will go to your wedding. That and to make snide remarks in my head about how much weddings suck. And if your wedding doesn't have cake then you are doing it wrong and I will be very unhappy and disappointed about your life choices.

My dads girlfriends daughter is getting married. I am obliged (aka forced) to go to that wedding. She is getting married before me to some random guy I've never met before who apparently doesn't have a job and can barely afford an apartment and wants to move to Detroit to become the next Eminem. Really. Those were his words to my dad. I honestly did not see this wedding coming. I cannot believe the mother is even allowing this wedding to happen. But I will just say right now that there more than likely will be a blog post about this wedding event. I can see this being blog-worthy in the most cringeable way.

^Oprah knows what's up with my life.

The other two wedding invitations were from one of my high school friends who I haven't spoken to in years and one from a distant cousin who lives in San Francisco who I haven't seen since I was 5. I was thinking about traveling to San Fran but  plane tickets are quite costly and I really don't know this cousin enough to shell out hundreds of dollars for a plane ticket.

Then I found out that my former best friend just got engaged to her girlfriend on Facebook. They have been dating for ONE MONTH. It seems like they really love each other but  I personally feel that one month is a bit too short of a time period to know if you want to spend the rest of your life with someone. I also feel that none of this is really my business or concern, yet here I am talking about people and their future wedding plans.

The room is spinning and I have no way of making it stop. It's like everything I learned or thought I knew of marriage and love and commitment  is a lie. I blame period dramas because blaming myself for my lack of love life would be a very lame thing to do.

As much as I joke that I never want to get married I kind of do hope to be married someday. But the sad reality is that I'm going to die alone. Nobody takes any interest in me. Nobody ever will. And if you want to comment and say something along the lines of "You're 23! There's still time for you to find love! Bleblarblu" I may be 23 but that doesn't mean anyone could ever grow to love me. My family doesn't even care about me, why would anyone else? Dying alone is my biggest fear. I've never told anyone that but it truly terrifies me, because there is a large possibility of that happening. What if nobody knows who I am at the time of my death? Would my headstone just be left blank? I had a dream about that last week. I was standing over my own headstone. Great thing to dream about, right?

Tuesday, September 30, 2014

Casting People Who Don't Audition

I have been really sucking at keeping this blog updated. Part of it is because I've been really busy and part of it is because I've been writing everything down in a paper notebook for the past few months or so. But for some reason today I thought "Hey, I haven't blogged in awhile. Let's do that!" So here I am again.

Anyways, let the record show that today was a truly terrible day for me. I auditioned for a play this week. It was supposed to only be a one day thing but because some asses from a different theatre in the town couldn't  audition on the day scheduled the process was a two day thing. And it was Shakespeare mixed with a current movie theme. I love me some Shakespeare and movies are pretty cool so I was just excited and happy to audition. Only about 6 people showed up the first day, the the second day three of us from the previous day showed up unknowing that it was to be another audition day and besides us three only three other people showed up. All in all 9 people auditioned, not including me, so 10 in total.

This director emails us the cast list today and let's just say that seven of the ten people cast DIDN'T EVEN AUDITION. WTF is that all about?!?!? And then they give me a role with TWO BLOODY LINES. I am not picky about which roles I get, as an actor who hasn't seen the stage for a few years you can't be picky, but if I am driving 25 minutes to this college IN NOVEMBER IN THE SNOW then it better be worth my time. Two lines are not worth my time and I am going to have to pass on this.

Then to make me feel even more special about my role, sir director made a little side note that said that anyone without an asterisk next to their name (which was only me and two other people) wouldn't be needed until 1 pm on the rehearsal dates while all the other cast gets to come in and read stuff and rehearse at  10 am. Nothing brings a cast closer together than separating them then adding some random two liner people in at a 30 minute rehearsal. X_X

Kind of ridiculous if you ask me. I think I'm mostly irritated by the fact that people who didn't even audition got roles. I question that so much and makes me truly hate the production and the people who didn't audition and the director for even thinking this was a good idea. Thus why I'm passing on performing in this. I mean, if the director called me and was like "Hey, would you like this role for a play you didn't even audition for?" I would probably hesitatingly take it. But that's not what happened in this case and honestly I'm glad it didn't and I hope it never does. I would never feel right about taking a role I didn't even audition for and the guilt would eat me up inside. Yes, having someone think you are great and reliable as an actor is wonderful, but there should be some rules layed out, rules such as YOU HAVE TO AUDITION TO GET A FREAKING ROLE!

I have a question about this entire thing. Is this the norm in other places, to cast people who didn't even audition? Because I am getting fed up with it. It's seems to have happened/is happening a lot near my area and it seems hokey to me. But maybe that is how it works in places like Chicago and New York and I'm only now coming to a discovery about what's going on.