Friday, May 30, 2014

Talking Politics

Now, I made a promise to myself in the past that I would never post anything regarding my political opinions on this blog. However, I can no longer remain silent. That is not to say this post will give you any insight as to  whether I'm a republican/democrat/tea party/etc. I have just heavily disappointed in our president and our administration over the past few months as well as some of the comments people are continuously making.

 Some of these comments include;


  • YOU ARE RACIST! (If you say something against Obama or his family)

Someone from every single party ever;

  • You're so stupid! Here is a list of reasons as to why you and your party are so stupid!

Once you call someone with an opposing viewpoint 'stupid' your political point goes out the window.

We all live in the same country. Stop trying to tear the people down who have different opinions than yours. Everyone has a right to think whatever they want and trying to get them to be on your side with these types of retorts is absolutely idiotic. We all need to stop this. Talk about the issues, debate one another, be informed, don't talk smack.

As for the reason I am writing this very political blog entry tonight;

We all know Jay Carney resigned today as well as Shinseki (no big surprise on that last one),  but that's not what I'm going to talk about.

It has come to my attention that apparently Obama is planning to run for a 3rd term. I'm guessing this is a lie because not only is that impossible, that is not how the government works!

According to the 22nd Amendment;

Section 1. No person shall be elected to the office of the President more than twice, and no person who has held the office of President, or acted as President, for more than two years of a term to which some other person was elected President shall be elected to the office of the President more than once. But this article shall not apply to any person holding the office of President when this article was proposed by the Congress, and shall not prevent any person who may be holding the office of President, or acting as President, during the term within which this article becomes operative from holding the office of President or acting as President during the remainder of such term.
Section 2. This article shall be inoperative unless it shall have been ratified as an amendment to the Constitution by the legislatures of three-fourths of the several states within seven years from the date of its submission to the states by the Congress.

Basically there is no way in hell Obama can run another term unless this amendment is repealed. To do so that would require 2/3rds of both the house of representatives and the senate to vote to amend the constitution, or by a convention called by 2/3rds of the state legislatures. Then 3/4ths of the states (38 states) need to vote for the amendment for it to become part of the constitution.

 I don't see this happening anytime soon. Plus, Obama stated once that he really has no desire for a 3rd term. so I'm almost positive this news story is a lie. But that doesn't stop some people from making idiotic comments like these;

I can't wait for President Obama's 3rd Winning Term!- He hasn't even said that he's running for a 3rd term yet! Calm down!

The 2nd Amendment is old-fashioned and outdated. We need more gun control laws to make America safer.- What in the world does this have to do with anything?!?!? 

Dude, the Constitution is, like, over 100 years old. - Dude, the Constitution was written for a reason! Educate yourself. 

Barack Obama needs a third term to accomplish what he did in two terms......nothing.- That is not true. He has done a few things, whether or not those things are good is up to you. 

I'm really hoping I didn't offend too many of you by writing this, but if I did I truly apologize. I'm just sick and tired of seeing such uninformed and idiotic comments on every news story I ever read on the Internet and after that announcement of a possible third term for President Obama today (and the comments to go along with the article) I felt I needed to state my opinion on this issue before my head exploded.

Sunday, May 11, 2014

Scared of Graduating

Today I went back to my college and gave the people at the registration desk my ID so I could pick up my cap and gown. I'm graduating on Thursday and truth be told when I first started college I never really expected to graduate. None of my family members did and I only know of three people who have graduated from a college/university setting. I'm proud of myself but also kind of terrified.

What some of you may not know is that in high school I had the most stressful time before graduation. On the day before graduation where all of us students practiced walking, one of my teachers wouldn't give me my cap and gown because I  didn't give her back one of her books. So after the practice walk, instead of having cake with the rest of my fellow classmates (who hated me) I had to run back home, find the book and turn it into her before I received my cap and gown. The secretary was about to put the caps and gowns in storage before I ran up to her in the hallway where she proceeded to have a convulsion about my fast pace of speed until finally handing me my graduation attire.

Oh and I had no one to walk with. Usually people tended to find their walking partner their junior year, but because I had no friends in my grade I had no one to walk with and got stuck with these two guys who were a bit odd. My moms best friend in high school's kid was walking with me, and that just seemed to tickle her peachy so all and all it could have been worse.

I guess I'm afraid that college graduation is going to somehow turn out to be like high school graduation, despite the fact that this will probably not be the case. I'm afraid that I won't know anyone. I'm afraid the college will decide at the last minute that we all have to choose a walking partner and I will be alone again. And there's always that fear of falling on your face when you walk the stairs to get your diploma. I won't be wearing heels but because I have a habit of falling down on a regular basis this could be a problem. But just so we are clear, if I was to fall down, it wouldn't be because I want to draw attention to myself. I can actually see someone doing that. Those types of people deserve to get a concussion while they pretend to fall just so they can look 'cool.'

But although I have my small little fears, I will not let anyone or anything ruin this day for me. Graduation is going to be spectacular and although I have no idea what will happen after, I know that on this day I will feel like I accomplished something and that is enough to make me happy.

Friday, May 9, 2014


That is the number of people who have read my post about the cold water challenge. I am in shock. I am in awe. I am really amazed. I never really expected anyone to ever even read this blog EVER. But to those 507 people who have read that post, I just want to send out a huge thank you and shall now provide you with cookies (or biscuits as they are called in basically every other part of the world besides the US and Canada) and tea for your awesomeness! Even if you didn't agree with what I had to say on the matter I do appreciate that you took your time to read a 23 year old girls little blog post. In a way, it makes me feel kind of special. =P And if you are one of those people who just read that post and gave it a 'view' or whatever it's called on here, I give you many hugs and thanks as well.
Now onward to the cookies and teeeeaaaaa!!!

For those of you who despise cookies and tea, here is a unicorn. Nobody can dislike a majestic unicorn.

Thursday, April 24, 2014

Cold Water Challenge!

Here are my two cents about the cold water challenge. 
This is absolutely ridiculous. So ridiculous that the word absolutely doesn't even cover how freaking stupid I think this is. 

What the challenge is;
 People jump into freezing water then they will tag their friends below their video post claiming that if they don't do the challenge (jump in some type of cold water) then they have to donate $100 to charity. If the tagged people listen to you and attempt the challenge it's the charity of the idiots choice, if the tagged person tells you to eff off then the tagger forces those people to donate money to THEIR charity, which could be a charity titled "Ricky's Student Loans" for all we know. 

Either way,  if you don't jump into some cold water you HAVE to give money to your friends charity. Because your friend told you to. And you HAVE to listen to your friend because they CHALLENGED you.

Or a better explanation of what this challenge is from a guy on Tumblr;
Cold water challenge is something some asshats in the country in ohio seem to be doing just for kicks, even though they say it’s for charity but if you ask what the charity is they have no idea, the concept is that you get tagged by someone who’s done the challenge and then you go out to your pond (since we’re in the country we swim in ponds) and jump in the freezing cold water (because it’s Ohio and the water’s about 45 degrees.) and then you have to swim back to shore and stand in the cold while you tag three people you want to do the same challenge. What’s stupid is they don’t realize they can get hypothermia and their muscles can spasm and they can drown. So not only is the point stupid, but the things that could possibly happen is stupid as well. 

^Dude makes a very good point. 

But the main point I'd like to make is, you don't HAVE to do anything. I know someone out there right now will be like; "Haha if you don't do anything then you owe my charity money." No. No. No. I GIVE YOU AND YOUR CHARITY NOTHING. You're not getting $100 just so you can donate it to a charity of YOUR choice because I don't accept this peer pressure BS could-catch-hypothermia challenge. I will give my money to the charities I picked to donate to years ago and you can go tie yourself to a tree because I'm not dealing with you and I'm sure as hell not paying you because I don't feel like being an icicle. 

Not to mention 99% of the people doing this aren't even donating to charity. Rather, they are jumping in water in their hot new swimsuits just to show off. Because as we all know, social media will always transform something meant for a good cause into something about you. Sad but true statement.

At my old house I used to jump in my pool whenever we opened it in like May, and it was cold and I swam in it for 20 minutes or so. And I never got any money. OR hypothermia. I think I got lucky on that last one but I did it because I'm badass, not because someone pressured me to do it. I just watched 5 of these videos where some fools are going into the water for 2 seconds then running out because of the coldness factor. Or screeching then running out like a duckling who just got separated from it's flock. You people are weak. At least try to last 30 seconds, give us that. Or better yet, you can try staying in the water for 24 hours which is the time frame you have given all the people you have challenged to be charitable to charity.

"But I only have 10 seconds of recording on my Iphone!" is not an excuse to be lame. Use a camcorder, those things do still exist. Or better yet, don't do the challenge! Brilliant ideas I have sometimes.

I've seen about 20 idiots on my Facebook jumping into cold water so far. Life choices, ya'll need to make BETTER ONES.  You should donate to a charity because you want to donate to a charity, not because your stupid friend tagged you in a stupid post on a stupid social networking site for stupids.  Being nominated through social media to donate money to some charity is absurd. And when something is absurd, we talk about it and laugh at the absurdity on this blog. 
Some FB posts;

  • I can't believe I took the #crazygirlstatus- More like hashtag attentionseekerstatus. You CHOSE to accept the challenge. 
  • CWC4TW- I can actually understand this (sadly.) Cold water challenge for the win!!! Uh... you don't win any cool points when you jump into cool water unless you are a polar bear.

  • My boy Kenny done did the cold water challenge- Note to readers; NEVER say "done did."
  • Im gonna cry! Just got tagged for the cold water challenge!- Save your tears girly gumdrops. You'll be crying a lot more when you jump into that leech filled pond.
  • I love watching all of these cold water challenge videos. So simple, so fun, and so helpful.- You are living in la la Land if you really think these videos are 'helpful' to a cancer patient in any way.
  • Your going to hell if you don't do the cold water challenge- Yaaay! Hell time! I hear that place can be hot.

Now, if anyone decides to tag me for this stupid STUPID thing
Or better yet, I will find you. Then I will find a freezing body of water then place your head under the water for a long time. Then we will see what happens. Probably nothing good.

I shall now leave you all on a happier note unrelated to lameness with Bill Cosby dancing in a challenging way.

Sunday, April 13, 2014

Idiots on Facebook Round 6!

Worki on the Chevy.... Hahaha with skill- HAHAHA! As opposed to working on the chevy WITHOUT skill!

Just a day shooting guns.... Do i have to mention she looks damn sexy  love ya babe- But what does shooting a gun have to do with a sexy lady? Unless of course you are calling the gun sexy and telling it that you love it, which I guess that is not my place to question. 

Shes looking sexy now!!! With the 33 in the front and 35 in the back.... Hillbilly Nascar right thur.... Now i just need 2 more 33 lazt!- When has everyone suddenly become sexy?!?!? Grr. I don't know what those numbers mean but you just said Hillbilly Nascar and that is reason enough for me to avoid you forever. And is lazt truly a word? Or have we really become so lazy that typing 'lazy' out on our keyboard is too much of a hassle? I think I am going to try using lazt in every day conversation from now on, like this;

Person: You're a girl!

More day week. Anyone feel like finding some trouble tomorrow night? — (Tags 28 people)- I'm not even surprised how this guy tagged all his "troublesome" friends. I'm more curious as to what a day week is

Been out in the woods all day got the ranuoger a lil muddy an found out jeep is bad ass hahaha jus gotta go fast.- Yes. It is always a swell idea to drive at a fast pace, especially when a friendly park ranger/police man catches you. And here's some advice incase you wish to have any future endeavors with your ranuoger jeep thing; mud does not make any motor vehicle camouflaged

Trashy people goona break in my car steal my wallet money an tryed to get my cd player but they wow f*** u trash @ss people!- What on earth are you trying to spell to me you awkward young heathen?

Staying hr all week my baby girl should be her soon I hope mybe can't wait to see her- So you may be seeing your girlfriend hopefully maybe? This sounds alarming! Maybe you should give her a call and ask her if she's still alive! That may be helpful!

For everyone 4 thinks I have changed in thy last year us are right I have changed but it's for the best I had to grow up for my d8er single parent you have to gret up and do thingz yes it was my choice but it was all for ma little princess I didn't change because of anyone and if people don't like how I have changed then it's whatever.

A good question; HOW do people like this reproduce?!?!? And you know her daughters a brat, you just know it! 

My hand hurts bad, I havent hand written a paper in like 10 years lol, but im almost done with it, feeling excided to go back to school, hoping everything goes good- Now this is not the most horrible post in the entire world, but it is a foreign concept to me considering I always hand write everything before typing it up (usually.) I'm not one of those people who can sit at a computer and think of creative words right off the bat while staring at a blank screen. That probably sounds weird, but it's kind of how I am. 

Question time! 
What is the strangest thing you have ever read or seen on Facebook? Comment below! =)

Thursday, April 3, 2014

I Am Apparently Not Blogging This

It is now officially 1:40 am here in Michigan. Which means that it is the most perfect and excellent time to call random people up in the dead of night and scream at them about their non-existent pregnancies!

My phone rang and considering that it was such an ABSURD time I thought that maybe one of my families houses was on fire. Or someone died. Or someone got beaten up by a hobo with a club sandwich. Basically I don't know what's going on but it must be pretty important to telephone my household at 1:30 in the morning.

However, that was not the case at all! I got to have a wonderful conversation with Billy Son Man Jr about how I am a complete prostitute! I bet the ladies of the street in Les Mis didn't have to go through this telephone nonsense!

Here is how this conversation went;

Me (half asleep): Hello?
Me: Whaaat?
Billy Son Man Jr: You heard me you slutbag ho! What'd I keep reminding you of when we got engaged? PROTECTION. PROTECTION. PROTECTION. You can't go sleeping with others unless I approve of the intimacy! And ta hell if I'm the father! I ALWAYS use our fave protection!
Me: A life vest? (Hahahaha. Hooray for bad jokes at 1:30 in the morning!) 
Me: No. You called the wrong number. However I did appreciate listening to your tyrannical ranting on this fine evening. Thank you. You have just given me something to blog about.
Me: 0_0 Not on my waaaaatch. Goodbye! (hangs up phone.)

Didn't he seem like such a nice fellow? So nice that I even gave him a name. I weep real life tears for you Tasha. There is so much wrong with this, and that makes the entire thing hilarious. I kind of wish I would have said yes to being Tasha's roommate. I bet Billy had some words for her as well! I'm quite positive that I will get to see this guys face one day for he and Tasha are destined for a future episode of Maury.

Monday, March 31, 2014

This Week Has Sucked

Majorly. I recommend that it ends now.

I think any day of the week where I get insulted by my own family members is a week that needs to end. My aunt had her birthday party yesterday. Please  take note that I never technically got an invite to this party. With any family gathering I am always invited through my mom. Nobody ever calls and tells me about these gatherings. I always find out about these things because my mom tells me. Although everyone was super calm during the party, the calm part ended about halfway into eating the cake.

My grandmother kept making a whole bunch of homophobic comments and was saying incredibly stupid and uninformed things like how she's glad that those bastards in congress didn't pass the bill so those gays can't marry in our state of Michigan. Alright grandmother, that's not what is going on what so ever. Time for you to actually read a newspaper instead of relying on what BBC America tells you. I basically told her this and obviously that was a mistake on my part for my entire family decided to gang up on me saying that the only reason I would defend "those PEOPLE" is because I was gay myself. Now I'm not gay (and even if I was would it really be that big of a deal?) but I do have some gay friends and feel that they would not take kindly to being called THOSE PEOPLE. They are not slaves, they are human beings and deserve to be treated as such and not called names just because they prefer one sex romantically over the other. Ignorant little heathens my family are.

After that conversation ended my cousin thought it would be super fun to tell us about how she dropped her $600 cell phone but is planning to get a new one tomorrow. ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?!?!? Who drops a $600 cell phone?!?!? How does one drop a $600 cell phone? Who can even afford a $600 cell phone? That's so freaking stupid! Her excuse for dropping her cell phone was that she had some coffee in her hand along with her 4 year old daughter who can walk and she had to decide which one she had to drop. I'm sorry but was your plastic cup filled with black coffee from the gas station really more expensive than a $600 cell phone?!?!? I think not!!! And then, then her boyfriend is buying her ANOTHER FREAKING CELL PHONE. This is such bullshit! If you can't take care of the first $600 phone then you sure as hell don't need another one! I don't care if this guy is your lifelong soul companion or whatever it is they are calling it these days, you treat him horribly and yet he is kind enough to ask you to MARRY HIM. And you want to have another child, but with him this time! Oh and is he aware that you were still dating your now deceased boyfriend while also dating him? Because I don't think he is aware of that and if he is then that is very sad.

Oh and Ms. Cousin Face thought that on her mothers birthday would be an acceptable time to discuss her summer wedding plans. Apparently it is going to be a country themed wedding, because of course it is. Nothing says country to me liked girls who wear $52 eyeshadow and carry Louis Vuitton purses and listen to Lil Bow Wow J Dawg Tiger Dude. And here is what tickles my fancy, everyone is required to bring a date. REQUIRED to bring a date or no entry. Because that's a sure fire way to get people swarming for an invitation! When's the last time I had a date? That's right, NEVER. So I guess I won't be allowed to attend.

I can actually see either her or my aunt getting super drunk during this wedding and looking like Cinderella in this gif. And if I miraculously find a date I will be recording all of it for "research." MWAHAHAHAHA.
Oh and then she showed us all her Pinterest board which was titled "Somuday." Dear God, why does everyone enjoy screwing with the English language so much? SomUday. Sounds like "Som mooooo day" as if a cow wrote it. With a keyboard!!! As opposed to a typewriter or notepad!
Freaking Pinterest. I'm stalking hers right now and this is what SomUday has on it;
- Turquoise, neon green, and coral wedding jewelery to go with a WHITE DRESS. Ain't nobody got time for classy matching!
- The ring she wants. She already has a ring so I'm confused by this. But the ring is 'george!' Yeah, George, not gorge. THEY AREN'T EVEN TRYING ANYMORE!!!!!!!
- A must have 1st dance photo. FRAMED.
- "Simps but ele centerpiece." You can write centerpiece but simple and elegant are words that are too complicated to write. Get out of town!
- Lots of 'prits ides!" I DON'T EVEN KNOW!
- "Maps from where you got engaged, where you got married, and where you went on your honeymoon... SO adorable!" Whaaat? Unless you develop some kind of brain tumor this is not needed! And also not SO adorable! You want to know what's adorable? NOT THIS.
- "Wheelbarrow wagon." If anyone can explain what this is to me I will send you a cupcake, no charge.

Honestly that's all I can read. My cousin has been the biggest pain in the ass to me ever since she started hanging out with the kids in my class who made my daily life a living hell  in high school after she already graduated about 5 years ahead of them. She is the basic epitome of the type of person I cannot stand. I understand that we are family and we should never talk about our dislike for each other to the outside world. Family problems should stay within the family, blah blah blah.  But shouldn't there also be a few rules as to what family members shouldn't do so they don't end up hating each other and never speaking to one another again? Here are a few things I came up with; 

What NOT To Do If You Want To Be A Good Cousin/Sister/Brother/Person etc.

1. Make rude and inconsiderate remarks that could stick with a person for years to come.
2. Hang out with the people who bullied a family member since 7th grade
3. Flirt with family members stupid small little crushes. This can make the stupid small little crush ask the crushing family member for their cousins number. And ask if the cousin is dating anyone. And then she will be extremely hurt. 
4. Tell an already depressed family member to go kill themselves
5. Lay a hand on a family member just because they don't care for a certain celebrity
6. Rip up a family members book because "Reading is for losers" and because "Only losers read." 
7. Tear down a family members self worth every time you see them. 
8. If a family member is having a good day, make sure to make it even better by calling said family member ugly and remind them that they will never be as good as you and will never be loved.
9. Push your family member off a bike and then laugh when she starts bleeding out of both her knees and elbow. 
10. Push your 2 year old cousin down the street in a stroller, 'accidently' smash her/his face into the sidewalk, laugh, but then tell your grandparents about how you ran home as fast as you could so you look like a freaking hero.
11. Make fun of your family member in front of your friends and also tell secrets about them. Bonus points if said friend has a brother (or sister) in the lame family members class.  Extreme bonus points if said brother/sister also hates the family member and will use everything they can to hurt the person in a public setting.
12. Try to drown your family member! Put their head under water and hope they don't come up for air! Who cares if you are 15 years old, this is completely acceptable behavior!
13. Tell people at your workplace to eff off. But because you are obviously better than your employees they will laugh at this comment and won't report you. 
14. And even if they did report you, who cares? You're sleeping with the boss anyways!
15. Big surprise! Boss man and you will have a kid and during your entire pregnancy you will be hormonal as hell which means you can be even meaner than usual and get away with it. Not like there's much you didn't get away with saying beforehand.
16. Name your kid after one of the most famous classic movie characters of all time and then when someone comments on the movie, scream at them and tell them; "I NEVER SAW THE MOVIE AND I DON'T PLAN TO! MY DAUGHTER IS NAMED AFTER A HOT (MEDIOCRE) ACTRESS!" X_X
17. Start dating three different guys while you're also canoodling with the father of your child.
18. Father of your child dies before he finds out about this. Gives you all his money, because of course he does.
19. Make sure your daughter makes stupid remarks just like you and swears by the age of 2! Also, no Disney princesses. We can't have the daughter liking princesses or classic Disney. God forbid!
20. Being pretentious. We have time for that!
21. Laugh and make fun of everything a certain family member is into. Your opinion matters.
22. Talk about a family member and make fun of them with your mother--- texting style! 
23. Go to your fathers funeral, inherit his money, tell the dead father and his family that you hate them. Leave. 

You know, I actually used to admire this cousin of mine. But ever since I was in 2nd grade I realized that this girl is not a very great person to look up to. I swear if she wasn't  pretty or rich she would NEVER be able to get away with half the things she does or says. But because much of society tends to overlook peoples personalities in favor of how a person looks on the outside, she can do or say whatever she wants. Not fair what so ever, but life has never been known to be fair. My mom says that I'm jealous of her, which is not necessarily true. If anything I pity her. She has never really had to work a day in her life and the one time she does get a job, she get's a child out of it along with thousands of dollars. She has also had about a hundred boyfriends in her life (some at multiple times!) But who cares if she's dating another guy at the same time she is dating her fiance? She get's a wedding! And a dress! And cake! What do I get? Just another true story to post about on my blog.

But I guess I am kind of happy for her to some extent. It is going to be her wedding day and the guy does seem to like her a lot. I really don't have any plans to ruin the most magical day of her life when the time comes, that would be a terrible thing to do and I do not want to be a terrible person. Unless she tries to drown me again, then I may be a terrible person and pull a Memoirs of a Geisha and color on her dress. =P