Monday, April 29, 2013

Carousel

This is the worst musical in the world next to Cats.
I had the pleasure of viewing Carousel last night on PBS Live from the Lincoln Center. 
First let me tell you the good parts about this God awful musical;

Good
1. The actors. I have always been a big Kelli O'Hara fan and was happy to hear that she would be the lead in this musical. The rest of the actors were also great and I'm almost positive Jessie Mueller is going to get more work after this, but it's hard to realize that these people are wonderful when their characters are so effing stupid.

2. The New York Philharmonic.
That is it. These are literally the only good parts about this musical.

The Characters
Julie Jordan- An idiot girl who needs some sense knocked into her head. 
Billy Bigelow- He is a stupid jerk ass and his last name is a brand of tea.
Mrs.Mullin- Some whore who owns a carousel .
Carrie Pipperidge- Stupid girl who's only goal in life is to become married.
Enoch Snow- Enoch is a stupid name and the guy is an asshat.
Nettie Fowler- Annoying and stupid lady.
Jigger Craigin- Idiot guy who loves being an idiot. Oh and God help the man who ever names his child Jigger.
Louise- Julie and Billy's daughter. Just like her parents, the character turns out to be an idiot. 



Review:



Audra Mcdonald tells the viewers about what the musical is about and we are then brought to the Lincoln Center where the New York Philharmonic play a long, and by long I mean a REALLY REALLY long overture called The Carousel Waltz before we get into the show. To imagine how long the overture is just remember the intermission for Gone With the Wind then subtract any fun aspect the music might have and add 5 or so more minutes.


After that is over we see two girls run onstage. Now I know this doesn't happen in every production if ANY but what irritated me was that when Jessie Mueller ran onstage it was quiet but as soon as Kelli O'Hara showed up the audience started applauding like crazy. Yes, Kelli is amazing and everyone who's seen or heard her in anything knows that. However applauding for one person when there are two on stage is ridiculously rude. But anyways-



We then meet Mrs. Mullin who is the owner of the carousel.She comes out spouting nonsense and being insanely pissed about these two girls riding on her carousel and how if she better not catch Julie near her carousel again because it's completely Julie's fault that her carousel barker (Billy) touched her for a second then put his arm around her waist. SCANDALOUS BITCH. 

Billy then comes out and the first words out of his mouth "OH SHUT UP" what a great guy! He interrupts this argument like a little jerk then says Julie can come back any time she wants, and adds that if she can’t pay, he’ll pay for a ride for her. Mrs. Mullin is all like "I own the carousel and I'm the boss. You are an idiot. You're bounced." (which is a fancy way of saying fired in this musical.)

Billy's response is something along the lines of ; What the hell ever. I'm too cool for this job yo. He then tells the girls "Don't feel sorry for me or I'll make you regret it." 
Julie is then all flustered and says "You quit your job for meeeeee?!?!?" Uh no Julie dear he was fired. Big difference. 
Billy then goes back to the carousel to get his things. He tells Julie and Carrie to wait until he gets back so they can have a drink.
Carrie then starts singing "You're a Queer One Julie Jordan" which is definitely a show opener song in this day and age. 0_o
After that song not even a minute later we have to hear a 5 or so minute song about Carrie's secret engagement to Mr. Snow and how she pretty much can't wait to bang him. Lovely.

Billy then comes back and this conversation pursues;

BILLY: “You still here?”
CARRIE: “You told us to wait for you.”
BILLY: “Well, what did you think I wanted with two of you? I meant that one of you was to wait. The other can go home.”

The audience laughed at this. How is this funny? It just shows that Billy is an even bigger jerk then he was 15 minutes ago! Carrie then leaves after Julie is all "TEHHEHEHEHE Billy is soooo dreamy!" Billy being his usual jerk self decided to tell Julie that he can get all the girls he wants. Great way to get a girl to love you Billy! 

‘Carousel’ at Lincoln Center — Nathan Gunn

Julie’s boss then shows up to take Julie home and forgives her for missing curfew. A policeman shows up with the boss and informs Julie of Billy’s record. Julie,being an idiot, decided to ignore mr. policeman and her boss and stays with the idiot Bigelow guy despite the fact that every red flag that has been given to her so far shows that Billy is a freaking loser!  



The two then sit on a bench and start singing about what would happen if they loved one another. It is the longest and most boring song in the history of musical theatre and I seriously almost fell asleep through it. The two  kiss for some reason and that's the end of the 30 minutes of a scene that I wasted my life over. 
We are then taken to a restaurant or something where Carrie shows up again and some other people are getting ready for a clambake. The only part about this I can remember is there are some extras that keep on singing;
"Give it to em' good Carrie give it to em' good!" 
I swear if I have to ever hear this again I will hang myself in a shower and I'm not even kidding. 


Nettie, the owner of whatever this is shows up and starts singing about how June is Bustin' Out All Over and everyone is super happy about it being June. That is the only point in this song; it is June. 


This scene perfectly displays that there is absolutely no reason for extras in this musical. The only reason the extras are there is because they have to sing the background vocals for some tremendously terrible songs.

In the next scene Julie shows up (after a month or so after being married to Billy) and starts telling Carrie that Billy is still not working and is hanging out with his friend Jailbird Jigger, and that he is still basically a loser. But she is okay with that. Then we get to the best part of the musical.
Julie: "He (indicating Billy) hit me."
Carrie: Did you hit him back?

This is the only part of the musical where I like a main character. Right on Carrie! 
Julie is then tells Carrie "He hit me but it didn't hurt!!! He's unhappy because he ain't workin. That's why he hit me!"
That makes sense! We will continue to hear about Billy being an abusive ass during the rest of the musical. 

Carrie then tells the extras and Julie that she is engaged to Mr. Snow and sings the reprise of the same song she sang before. We are then introduced to none other than Mr. Snow who just so happened to appear while Carrie was singing about him. What a coincidence! Mr. Snow's entrance tells us everything we need to know about him.
1. He's conceded and thinks he's the best person in the world.
2. He's annoying 
3. He's an idiot


About 5 minutes later Billy shows up and like usual, is a complete jerk and is rude to Mr. Snow who offered to shake his hand. Then again, Snow also wanted to talk about his chest cold so that could be a reason as to why Billy didn't wish to associate with him. Billy also threatens to hit Julie again. What a wonderful husband! He then tells us that "He ain't going to no clambake" which is a metaphor for "I refuse to be seen in public with my wife who I just happen to hit every so often."


Billy and Julie leave the stage so we are left with Carrie and ENOCH (Mr. Snow) who thinks it wise to question Billy's lifestyle choices then proceeds to sing a song bragging about how he will accomplish everything he wants to do in life and how he plans to get Carrie pregnant 8 or so times. Carrie by the way  has no say in any of this but obviously has feelings about children.



After that catastrophe of a scene we are brought to some place where Billy and Jigger sing a song with some extras for no reason other than to get the extras a paycheck. Oh and to tell the audience their plans of ROBBERY. Jigger wants himself and Billy to ROB  the mill owner for some money. I'm not sure about Billy, but in Jigger's case he better believe he's going back to jail once his parole officer finds out about this scheme.

Mrs. Mullin's comes back into the picture and offers to give Billy his job back. The only way she'll accept him back though is if he leaves Julie. Billy says "he'll think about it" which is messed up in so many ways. Mrs. Mullin tries to have a conversation with this loser when out of nowhere she says that "You beat her." Billy's response?

"I DID NOT BEAT HER. I HIT HER. I DID NOT BEAT HER! I'LL KILL ANYONE WHO SAYS OTHERWISE." GRR RAGE! 
Julie comes out of her house when Billy is thinking about leaving her and tells him that she's pregnant.  Oooh now we're getting somewhere! What a twist that came out of absolute thin air.

Billy goes back to Mrs. Mullin and does the only responsible thing he ever does in this musical and decides to stay with Julie to support their kid. Although when you look at it in another light, Billy just declined the one and only job offer he will ever get so once again Billy is somewhat of an idiot. 


Mrs.Mullin laughs at Billy about how he's going to become a father which leads to Billy almost strangling her dramatically.
We then have to hear Billy sing a 10 minute long song about his soon to be son who he will name Bill. Not like Julie get's any choice in naming the child or anything because as we all know, the father is the one who has to go through excruciating labour pains! He then comes to the realization that the child might not be a boy after about 8 minutes. 
You can have fun with a son
But you gotta be a father to a girl


So if it's a boy he doesn't have to take on any responsibilities. If it's a girl he's screwed! 


After the song is over Billy agrees to help Jigger rob someone so he can support his child. I can think of a million better ways to help support a child, robbing someone is not even on the list. 

Oh and remember when Billy said "I ain't going to no clambake." Well he's going now so he can use that as an alibi when he and Jigger have to run from the cops because their robbing plan is bound to go terribly wrong.

End of ACT I.


Now if you are still reading this and are on the edge of your seat wanting to know what happens in the next and final act, here you go!

ACT II
Act II opens with everyone in the cast at the clambake. Singing about the clambake. Originally the song "A Real Nice Clambake" was written for Oklahoma! as "A Real Nice Hayride." Either way though the song should have just been burned so it could never see the light of day. By far this is the worst song in the musical. I wanted to go outside, get a rock, and throw it at my TV every time these people sang the chorus.
However I could see a ton of the extras faces and in their mind you can tell that they were thinking "This isn't worth it."


Once the song ends, Nettie tells everyone that "They all will clean up the mess they made" before the men can go on the treasure hunt. I'm wondering since when did this lady have the power to tell everyone what to do? I would have thrown something at her, like a rock. And why can't the woman go on a treasure hunt? Are they not pirate-y enough? Can woman not be good at treasure hunting? That's screwed up. When I was forced to go to camp when I was younger my cabin had to go on a "treasure hunt" and find 5 counselors. We found 6. And we all just so happened to be a girls.

But anyways, Billy starts telling Jigger about how he has a knife under his coat for the robbery which everyone watching already knows considering he makes it pretty obvious that he has a knife hidden at the end of Act I. Billy then leaves and the only two people left onstage are Carrie and Jigger.

Jigger stars making a move on Carrie for some unknown reason considering the two haven't even spoken before this. Carrie tells Jigger that he better get his damn hands off of her cuz she be a happily engaged woman! Jigger tells Carrie that he will teach her how to defend herself then picks her up. Enoch happens to find this unacceptable and tells Carrie that he can't marry a woman who is "loose, free, and lollygagging" LOLLYGAGGING. Now there's a word I haven't heard in a long time.

Carrie then stars breaking down and crying while Enoch sings about Geraniums in the Winder. Once again this is not Rogers&Hammerstein's best work.The song tells us how Enoch is feeling sorry for himself (even though he's the one who called the marriage off because another guy touched Carrie in a non-provocative manner.) Carrie continues to cry while Enoch keeps pushing her away from him while basically calling her a tramp. Enoch is too virtuous a man to touch you Carrie!

Jigger looks like he's about to punch Enoch in the face for being so stupid, but instead of something hilarious like that happening we get to listen to a song which repeats the phrase 
Stonecutters cut it on stone
Woodpeckers peck it on wood
What does that even mean?!?!?!? If anyone can tell me what that means I will buy them a croissant or something. 
Carrie then tells Enoch to say "Say something soft and sweet" to her.  The actor who plays Enoch in this production took a long dramatic pause then said "Boston Cream Pie" AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. That's a rib buster! 

^Boston Cream Pie is hilarious! Just look at it!

After that nonsense the treasure hunt begins! Nettie tells them that the team that finds the treasure get to kiss any girl they want! Knowing this musical that sounds like a wonderful prize considering the treasure would probably only be something like CLAMS or a SHINY NICKER instead of real gold or something that could be beneficial to get anyone off this stage.

Julie goes up to Billy and tells him that "Pairing up with Jigger is a foolish mistake because neither of them know the island very well." Being Billy's usual jerk self he completely disregards his wife's advice because he has other plans. Like robbery.

Once the guys all leave all of the girl extras tell Carrie that marriage sucks and that she's better off being a free woman. Julie comes in and we have to hear the damn reprise of Tell it to em'good! only this time it's towards Julie. Julie tells Carrie that marriage is awesome and that if you love someone it doesn't matter if they are a stupid moron. 

Billy and Jigger come into the scene for some unknown reason where Julie tells Billy that she wants to go with them and feels the knife under Billy's coat. How do you think Billy responds to this? If you guessed "be an abusive idiot" you're correct! He says; 
"I got no time to fool with woman! OUT OF MY WAY" then roughly pushes Julie out of his way. She's lucky she didn't fall down. Oh and how do the extras respond to seeing Billy being an abusive jackass? If you guessed "be an idiot" you're right again! The extras tell Julie that even though Billy's a jerk she should still love him. This is the worst advice ever!

The lighting for the stage grows dark and we are shown Billy and Jigger, both who are waiting for the mill owner to arrive so they can rob him, or I'm sorry MURDER him. It went from robbery to murder. This should go over well.

The mill owner shows up and Billy asks for the time while Jigger sneaks up behind him. The mill owner is on to their bullshit and pulls a Jackie Chan style move on Jigger and pulls a gun on Billy. The mill owner is my all time favorite character in this musical. The mill owner is like "You wanted to know what time it is. I'll tell you what the time for you will be. 10 or 12 years in prison." Bwahaha. Mr. mill owner you are awesome! 
Jigger runs away and the police show up. Billy decides to do the only logical thing to help his child now and stabs himself. The mill owner says that Billy's "a fool" and that he didn't have the money anyways so Billy did this for absolutely nothing. 

The rest of the clam-bakers show up to the scene at this time. Julie is sad because Billy is pretty much going to die. She tells him how much she loves him despite the fact that he just left her with no money and no support for her unborn child. 

Nettie shows up and her and Julie start singing You'll Never Walk Alone which is honestly a wonderful song and one of R&H's best. Mrs. Mullin's also appears out of nowhere and gives her condolences. 




You thought that was the end? Think again!

Some guy who we've never seen before comes onstage and starts talking to Billy. At this point Billy get's up from his dead position and starts walking around while Julie and Nettie are continuing to grieve. The guy who just showed up tells him that he needs to come along to be judged. Billy, being his usual self says that "IF I'M GONNA BE JUDGED I'LL BE JUDGED BEFORE GOD HIMSELF." Because you totally deserve that right Billy. The new guy on stage takes Billy to the Starkeeper (played by John Cullum) who has some kind of power in heaven. The Starkeeper tells Billy that because someone on earth remembers him, he can go back to earth for ONE DAY and if he accomplishes to do one good thing he will be able to go to heaven. 


At this point in time Billy's daughter is now a 15 year old troubled girl. Billy comes back to earth because he reaally wants to go to heaven and watches as his daughter Louise (played by Tiler Peck) perfroms a ballet dance which shows us that she's lonely and that the other kids bully her because her father was an abusive ass. I actually enjoyed this part of the show for some reason, even if it did go on for 10 minutes but there really was no point in including a ballet number. 




Julie and Carrie come onstage after Billy decides it would be wise to help his daughter in some way. Basically the only thing we learn from Julie and Carrie is that a graduation is coming up and Carrie has 9 children, all of whom were helped made by Enoch. Enoch and Enoch Jr. arrive on the scene as Carrie is being SCANDALOUS by imitating a show she saw the other night. Enoch Jr. stays behind and tells  Louise that he is going to marry her to stop her from joining an acting troupe, but his father probably won't approve. Louise thinks Enoch Jr. is almost as bad as his father and orders him to go away.

Billy, watching the scene unfold, becomes visible (apparently he can become visible/invisible whenever he wants), scares the bejesus out of Louise, then starts telling her a story about how he was a friend of her fathers and starts bragging about what a wonderful person her father was. You want to know what else Billy is? A trespasser! 


Billy then presents Louise with a gift, a star he stole from the starkeeper. Louise, thinking this guy is off his rocker, refuses the star. Billy, being the typical Billy, then hits her. Next stop: HELL. You can't be stealing stars from someone in power then hitting your daughter. 



Louise runs inside to get Julie. Julie then runs outside and because Billy doesn't want to face her non-existent wrath he becomes invisible again.
This conversation then happens. 
Louise: Is it possible, Mother, for someone to hit you hard like that - real loud and hard, and it not hurt you at all?
Julie: It is possible dear, for someone to hit you, hit you hard, and it not hurt at all.

WTH. I am appalled by this in so many ways. 
Julie and Billy then sing a song which I can't remember much of because I'm still trying to watch this musical without smashing my TV because these characters are such freaking idiots.

The graduation ceremony begins and the Starkeeper, posing as some doctor gives some pretty good advice to the future generation. 
" I can't tell you any sure way to happiness. I only know that you've gotta go out and find it for yourselves. You can't lean on the success of your parents. That's their success. And don't be held back by their failures."

Billy, still invisible, whispers to Louise to believe the doctor guy. We hear a reprise of "You'll Never Walk Alone" being sung by everyone at this graduation. Louise is now accepted by everyone. Billy whispers into Julie's ear that he loves her then walks into heaven.

THE END.




My opinion

This is one messed up show. I obviously disliked a lot of it. There is no character redemption at the end and for some reason Billy get's to go to heaven for doing NOTHING. Oh wait, he did do something. He beat his wife and hit his daughter and was going to kill someone for some money! Not to mention he became a thief while he was in the afterlife.

In the Hungarian version of this musical, Liliom, Billy get's sent to Purgatory then goes to hell after hitting his daughter. I would have enjoyed this ending much better!

However once again I must stress is that all of these actors are amazing even with these sucky characters. Nathan Gunn (Billy) had a fantastic voice in this, which he should considering he's a professionally trained opera singer. I thought Kelli O' Hara was absolutely brilliant in The Light in the Piazza, The Pajama Game, and Dracula. I have heard Jessie Mueller's (Carrie) name before and she was terrifically fantastic with what she had to deal with here. Jason Danieley (Enoch Snow) I thought was alright. I had to do some looking around considering I had no idea who he was but I have actually heard him before. He was in the musical Floyd Collins, which most people have never heard of but I thought it was a great musical.

Oh well, you can't like all musicals even if you are a theatre major.

I'm thinking about writing a review about a musical every Monday if I can. No promises yet though. It's just something I think would be fun to do. 

Hope you liked reading this! =)

What Did I Just Read?


I had the misfortune to read this lovely little article today about why everyone should not attempt suicide. This is the worst thing I have ever read in my life. Victim blaming someone who is suicidal is just going to make them feel worse. Way to go kid who wrote this article.  This was clearly written by somebody who has never been suicidal, nor dealt with anybody who is suicidal. 
The article
Wanna kill yourself? (Wanna is not a word. If the first word of your guilt tripping paragraph is misspelled how is anyone supposed to take this seriously?) Imagine this. You come home from school one day. (Not all suicidal people go to school. Idiot.) You’ve had yet another horrible day. You’re just ready to give up. So you go to your room, close the door, and take out that suicide note you’ve written and rewritten over and over and over. (Personally I have never written a suicide note. Not saying people don't,  but personally I have never written one.) You take out those razor blades, and cut for the very last time. (So everyone cuts themselves if they are feeling suicidal? WTF.) You grab that bottle of pills and take them all. Laying down, holding the letter to your chest, you close your eyes for the very last time.
A few hours later, your little brother knocks on your door to come tell you dinners ready. (I don't have a little brother so this is a bullshit scenario.)You don’t answer, so he walks in. All he sees is you laying on your bed, so he thinks you’re asleep. He tells your mum this. Your mum goes to your room to wake you up. (Why didn't the brother just try to wake you up? Why do we have to get the mom involved?)  She notices something is odd. She grabs the paper in your hand and reads it.
Sobbing, she tries to wake you up. She’s screaming your name.
Your brother, so confused, runs to go tell Dad that “Mummy is crying and sissy won’t wake up.” (Oh okay. So now every household has to have a mom and a dad not to mention a brother and a sister. COMPLETE normality.) 
Your dad runs to your room. He looks at your mum, crying, holding the letter to her chest, sitting next to your lifeless body. It hits him, what’s going on, and he screams. He screams and throws something at the wall. And then, falling to his knees, he starts to cry. (Because in the real world everything is exactly like a movie drama!) 
Your mum crawls over to him, and they sit there, holding each other, crying. (While the brother is watching wondering why the two parents are acting so strange. But I guess we are supposed to forget about the brother at this point.) The next day at school, there’s an announcement. The principal tells everyone about your suicide. It takes a few seconds for it to sink in, and once it does, everyone goes silent. Everyone blames themselves.
Your teachers think they were too hard on you. (That's THEIR JOB.) 
Those mean popular girls, they think of all the things they’ve said to you. (The popular girls are the only ones who can say mean things to people. Right. And we are supposed to somehow believe they felt bad about what they said.) 
That boy that used to tease you and call you names, he can’t help but hate himself for never telling you how beautiful you really are. (This is starting to sound like a crap piece of fanfiction.) 
Your ex boyfriend, the one that you told everything to, that broke up with you.He can’t handle it. He breaks down and starts crying, and runs out of the school. (Because every suicidal person has an ex boyfriend! And people can flee the school whenever they want!) 
Your friends? They’re sobbing too, wondering how they could never see that anything was wrong, wishing they could have helped you before it was too late. (About 52% of suicidal people don't have friends and are extremely lonely.) And your best friend? She’s in shock. She can’t believe it. She knew what you were going through, but she never thought it would get that bad… Bad enough for you to end it. (This sounds like a suck best friend.) She can’t cry, she can’t feel anything. She stands up, walks out of the classroom, and just sinks to the floor. Shaking, screaming, but no tears coming out. 
It’s a few days later, at your funeral. The whole town came. Everyone knew you, that girl with the bright smile and bubbly personality. (Where I live only 1,428 people live in this town and I STILL don't know everyone.) The one that was always there for them, the shoulder to cry on. Lots of people talk about all the good memories they had with you, there were a lot. 
Everyone’s crying, your little brother still doesn’t know you killed yourself, he’s too young. Your parents just said you died. It hurts him, a lot. You were his big sister, you were supposed to always be there for him. (Oh lovely, some more guilt tripping!) 
Your best friend, she stays strong through the entire service, but as soon as they start lowering your casket into the ground, she just loses it. She cries and cries and doesn’t stop for days. (You cannot cry for days. It is physically impossible.) 
It’s two years later. The whole school talks to a counsellor therapist at least once a week. Your teachers all quit their job. Those mean girls have eating disorders now.
That boy that used to tease you cuts himself.
Your ex boyfriend doesn’t know how to love any more and just sleeps around with girls.
Your friends all go into depression. Your best friend? She tried to kill herself. She didn’t succeed like you did, but she tried…your brother? He finally found out the truth about your death. He self harms, he cries at night, he does exactly what you did for years leading up to your suicide.
Your parents? Their marriage fell apart.
Your dad became a workaholic to distract himself from your death. (My dad is a workaholic now. I'm still here.) 
Your mum got diagnosed with depression and just lays in bed all day.
People care. You may not think so, but they do. Your choices don’t just effect you. They effect everyone.
Don’t end your life, you have so much to live for. Things can’t get better if you give up. I’m here for absolutely anyone that needs to talk, no matter who you are.
Even if we’ve NEVER talked before, I’m here for you.

This is ridiculous. I have attempted suicide in the past. I am not perfect. Whoever keeps posting this around, you should feel ashamed of yourself for making people feel guilty that they would want to die. Posting this will not prevent anyone from killing themselves for several reasons, one being that this is too freaking long for most people to read and sounds like it was written by a 13 year old. Two is because the person who is thinking about suicide feels pretty bad already and thinks that there is not much in life worth living for. This post is not going to make a difference. You want to know what makes a difference? Being NICE, reaching out, and talking to people. 
Guilt tripping is not the way to go. Blaming the victims is freaking stupid. A lot of people are probably mad that I am writing about this but I am tired of seeing this post hanging everywhere around the internet. You cannot save a life by posting anything like this. You can save a life by being a good person and by NOT spreading this chain-letter around. 

Sunday, April 28, 2013

I Can Do Whatever I Want!

Just heard someone say this on Facebook. In many peoples minds whenever you turn a certain age you are  allowed to do anything you want. This is a false statement! You want to know what you CAN'T (okay, maybe not can't) but SHOULDN'T do at any age?
- Rob a bank
- Mug a little old lady
- Set fire to a church
- Set fire to ANY place
- Go to something political, jump onstage, and take the microphone away from the person speaking.
- Punch a child in the face
- Hand out drugs in front of a police station
- Cliff dive into a swamp with alligators
- Break into someones house in the nude at night.
- Give alcohol to someone under age at a local restaurant.
- Steal a gumball machine
- Carjack someone
- Sell a dead man's organs on ebay
- Stop breathing
- Marry Johnny Depp or any other celebrity who doesn't know you personally.
- Exceed the speed of light.
- Feed a unicorn grapes.

All of this and then some you CANNOT (or should not) do. So no, you cannot do whatever you want. If you are 21 yes you are finally allowed to gamble but you still cannot feed a unicorn grapes, that is preposterous!




Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Crazy

My mom just took our dog for a walk and started talking to the neighbors outside when all of a sudden she screams at me to "Close all of the windows because it's raining!" then slams the door shut despite the fact that I have been yelled at numerous numbers of times for slamming the door before.
So I closed all of the windows like she told me to do and 5 minutes later she goes into the house and starts yelling at me because all of the windows are closed! What? You just told me to close them mommy dearest. I swear she has bipolar disorder. She keeps telling me that I'm the bipolar one but there are two problems with that;
1. She didn't even start using the word until I explained to her all the little details of what it was.
2. SHE JUST YELLED AT ME FOR DOING WHAT SHE SAID TO DO 5 MINUTES AGO!

Goodness! And I'm the bipolar one. Right.

About 10 minutes ago she also started screaming at me for getting the mail. I ALWAYS get the mail. It is MY JOB to do so and has been for years! I am so confused. I think that I will just sit in this room and not let anyone come in. If they do, it will be at their own risk.

Maybe my mom just failed at getting sleep last night, I don't know. She may be exhausted because she had to work until 8 last night, didn't get home until 9, then had to wake up again at 5. But even if that's the case that is no excuse to be annoying.


Now that we got that out of the way, let's talk about another kind of crazy; Dzhokhar Tsarnaev. (Yes I copied and pasted his name.) If you don't know who that is get off my blog right now and Google his name. I'll wait. 

First and foremost I think Bostonians are wonderful wonderful wonderful people. Evil has not won and will never win if we have people like the ones who ran TOWARD where the bomb happened at the Boston Marathon to help the injured. The ones who knew they could be killed  trying to save lives but tried anyways. If we have medics and police and firemen and just all around great people doing great things evil will never win. 

I'm super glad they caught him alive though. The crazy SOB has some serious explaining to do. You can't kill innocent people and get away with it. You can't play the Gilligan's Island version of Where's Waldo in someones boat in someones backyard and expect someone not to notice. 

Secondly we all know they will try for the death penalty. In my opinion death is too good for him. He deserves to be tortured. I know this is America and we don't believe in brutal torture here but obviously this asshat didn't want to BE here so why not change the rules a little? That would probably take forever to do but I'm still not very happy about the possible outcome of this but I do respect our justice system immensely.

Thirdly, people need to stop being idiots about this entire thing. Idiot things I have seen;
"Jahar is HOTT!" - I know this guy is a loser but even if his name is hard to spell you people shouldn't be effing it up. It makes your stupid opinion less credible.  

Then there are thousands of things going around just like this.
“the bomber was so hot im upset”
“ya’ll admitting jahar was hot. smh bandwaggoners. back away slowly, he’s mine”
“jahar is too cute and young to be going down as a terrorist”
“if you ever have a chance to talk to jahar again tell him hes so hot”
“jahar can blow me up with babies”
“Why are guys so hot these days even Bombers are hot hot Jahar :)”

This disgusts me. You entire group of fangirls disgust me. You girls have absolutely no respect for the victims of this tragedy. He killed innocent people and the first thing you people say is; "Oh he's cute" you deserve to be punched in the face. Yeah, there will always be serial killer groupies but that doesn't mean I have to like it. 


Fourthly (is that even a word?) I am tired of reading and hearing about how he is innocent. 
Yeah, that’s why him and his brother carjacked someone, admitted to the guy they carjacked that they bombed the marathon, shot an MIT officer, threw explosives at police and then hid out in a boat. Totally normal behavior of an innocent person. Some people are speculating that "His mean older brother man him do it!" Oh, the one he deliberately ran over with a car? Alright.

By the way, unless you are a person who is being PAID to investigate this your evidence of him being innocent is not credible. Obviously the FBI is hiding some stuff which will probably be revealed when the court day get's closer. Calm down.  Just remember you can't believe everything you read or see, especially on the internet. Anyone can use Photoshop. In a way this goes for certain television channels too, especially CBS. 

I cannot fathom why anyone thinks he is innocent. By the way "I did some reseaarcchhhh so I know he's innOcent" is not a valid argument.  Twitter and Facebook and Tumblr and the Huffington Post are not credible sources. There is a large possibility that someone bigger was behind this but in the end him and his brother still carried out the act. They aren't going to get out of this without some jail time. 

Fifthly, the father and the aunt are nutty fruit bars. I'm sure most of you know that though. They keep playing the aunt's response about how the boys were set up for some reason and how the police ain't got no evidence. 0_o

Lastly, do not blame all Muslims for these guys' evilness. That's like thinking all Catholics are like John Wayne Gacy. Muslims have contributed a lot to society (calligraphy, coffee, modern chemistry, etc.) and blaming a certain religion is just stupid. A world without terrorists is what we should all want, not a world without Muslims. 


I shall get off my soapbox now. For more enjoyable material, watch this cute little bunny eating a flower!

I shall call him Freckles!

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Random Post

I can't sleep tonight for some reason so because of this I decided that I would write a blog.

I started thinking about the most random things from my past and what that can mean for my future. Last semester at college I remember a professor talking to me after class saying ">Last name!< You need to STOP showing these students up! It makes their confidence drop!" Ok so because I made a beautiful power point and didn't come to class with a boring lecture or show a 5 minute Youtube video  during the 10 minute presentation I am showing students up and making their confidence drop? I still cannot believe he said that to me. Not only is it stupid, it's just plain idiotic. Maybe I have issues with my confidence and that is why I try to do the best job that I can when it comes to everything. If it happens to be better than other peoples then that is not my fault. He had no right what so ever yelling at me because I did a good job. That's like yelling at someone who just received their first paycheck. NOBODY should feel horrible because they did a good job at something, anyone who tries to make you feel bad about your accomplishment is just a messed up SOB.

In all honesty my confidence has always been something I never had much of when it comes to certain things. At the moment I'm starting to think that I barely have any. That could just be because of my lack of sleep though, I swear I have only gotten about 72 hours of total sleep this week which can't be a good thing.

 But right now in my mind I'm going "Why am I still trying? Is there even a point in auditioning when I'm just going to get kicked in the face again?" when it comes to theatre. Granted, I haven't been to any auditions lately but that's how I'm feeling right now. I have also been writing a lot lately and trying to come up with some ideas to write a novel but there's a little voice in my head asking if this is something else that I'm going to completely fail at.

The thing is that I don't give into failure. People could beat me bloody senseless and knock me down again and again and again but I would still try to find a way to NOT fail. I'm not sure if that's a good or bad thing or if it's a psychiatric problem or something, but I am not a person who gives up easily.

I might just be having these thoughts because lately it seems like everyone has somehow made something of their life except me. People my age and younger are getting married and going to 3 star colleges and making their dreams happen while I just sit here time and time again and watch my dreams punch me in the stomach for even attempting to accomplish them. It's hard to keep a positive attitude when this keeps happening but I would rather be positive and have the outcome suck then be negative and have the outcome be good or still suck. Either way I'm not going to stop having fun with whatever I'm doing just because something bad may or may not happen. That is no way to live, not in my world.

That's pretty much all I have to say. Not much, but it's now said.


Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Boston

My heart and love go out to those in Boston. Things like this shouldn't happen. I will never understand anyone who does this type of stuff. . It is sickly and wrong and is just sickly wrong. Killing innocent people will get you nowhere in life. Sadly doing this horrible bombing probably made sense to the man/woman responsible for it. he If the bomber is caught there is no doubt in my mind that he will be executed. You can't do stuff like this and expect not to have a pay day. 

In other news, I am tired of hearing false stories about this tragedy.

SHE is a beautiful little girl, but she is not the 8 year old who is sadly no longer with us. Martin Richards, an 8 year old boy is the one who was killed. What makes this worse is that Martin was waiting near the finish to hug his parents when this happened. To the internet; shame on you. I bet this little girls parents are beyond mad right now that you would post a photo of their DAUGHTER and claim she is dead. This photo is from the 3rd Annual Joe Cassella 5K race that was held in Virginia in May 2012. If you don't know what you're talking about don't post stuff like this claiming it to be true. America already has enough problems that we don't need to deal with some asshole on the internet making up false stories so he or she can look like an FBI agent.

Another speculation I've heard around "The man who did this was black!" Um no. You have no proof of that. Nobody has any idea if it was an Asian or a Caucasian, or an Arab. The bomber's race is absolutely nothing. The bomber as a person is a terrible human being. Stop playing the race card.




However, when there is bad there is more good. Thank you to those in Boston who helped by donating blood, to the police, firefighters, paramedics, doctors, nurses, and everyone else who helped. Apparently there were so many people that wanted to help that some had to be pushed away. That is a good thing and truly gives me happiness to see that there are still great people out there.

I would also like to take the time to remember everyone affected by the Oklahoma City bombing, Virginia Tech massacre, Columbine shootings, and the Waco siege which all happened during this week. 

Monday, April 15, 2013

Youtube and Yahoo Answers!

Youtube

Dear Jbobadilla77 ~ I do NOT appreciate your FOUL language response back to my nine year old daughter!!!! Please STOP it now.- Alright this is the INTERNET. If you don't want your nine year old reading offensive comments then you should either take the computer away and burn it or put up some blocks on the computer and watch her. Nobody has to STOP it now. Once again this is the internet, people can say whatever they want if it's not against the guidelines. 

Amen. I love you. See you in the clouds!!- LOL. OK. 



your the N00b for believe in such a pathetic waste of brain space...- This makes no sense. I read it 10 times and am still trying to decipher what this person is trying to say. By the way this guy sounds like the N00b considering he cannot tell the difference between your and you're. 

If you even have you. You act like you dont.- This was a response to someone. This person either likes to use broken english or just sucks at explaining. 

I don't want to insult anyone but, tea? Bleh!!!  I prefer ice-cold water.- The hell? Well you DID just insult the tea lover that is me and I don't think anyone cares what you prefer.

Message me if you want the recipe I used. All the recipes I saw were super annoying, so I just made up my own!- Super annoying recipes. I am in shock and awe at how recipes can be super annoying. 



Yahoo Answers!
My girlfriend is a vampire and she stays in my closet during the day. I dont have the money for blood. What can i substitutes for human blood that i can buy at the grocery store?- No no no no NO. You're non-existent girlfriend is delusional! And "she stays in my closet during the day" makes me think that you are a pedophile/kidnapper! To answer the question though, watermelon juice. She'll never know the difference! 0_o


Idiot. Reminds me of the mom is Carrie. "YA CAN'T PLAY POKEMON BECAUSE IT'S THE DEVILS GAAAAAME." Oh. Okay.




YES! Pastalogy. 

Something I just saw on tumblr: 



What are our schools even teaching anymore? This is unacceptable. Seriously??? Now I know what listening to his music does to you! By the way I would love to know how Anne Frank is bullying him SINCE SHE DIED IN 1945!!! This is why you need to show up to your classes! How about you find out what is going on BEFORE you make stupid comments like this.

Saturday, April 13, 2013

Creepy Disney Times!

I have officially decided that there are two kinds of creepy; good creepy and bad creepy.
-People who memorize books word for word is creepy but not overly so. People who write depressing love poems on their blog and then post pictures of a human skull signifying that as their girlfriend is the BAD kind of creepy. Don't do that.
-Singing A New Argentina while your teacher is talking about the country of Argentina is odd but I would hug someone if they ever did that. Listening to Ozzy Osbourne on your ipod and singing at the top of your lungs down the hallway while doing a hip hop dance number is odd but as long as you are happy doing that then you shouldn't care. However, walking up to someone you don't know and singing Purple Rain in their face is the bad kind of odd and is surely not the way to go about approaching people.
-Cutting out paper swans and handing them to everyone you see is a kind sort of creepy. Cutting out someone's eardrum and showing it to the elementary school kids is the horrible kind of creepy.
- Naming your cat Lil' Hitler is a terrible thing to do. Throwing your cat into a swamp full of alligators is even worse and you should be having significant jail time for such stupidity. Cats don't float.
- Staring at someone for more than a minute is creepy. Staring at someone, pointing in their direction, then laughing maniacally is plain disturbing.

I just wanted to get that out there.

I have also officially decided that I will be having a Disney movie marathon this week. I will be watching;
*Snow White- I haven't seen that movie in forever and honestly I have always thought Snow White was awesome. I would love love LOVE to be her at Disney, but alas Disney's standards to characters are quite ridiculous and I shall blog about that another time.
*Sleeping Beauty- I have never seen this movie yet I have seen The Black Cauldron. I should be shunned for this...
* The Little Mermaid- Because someone thought it was such a wise idea to cancel the re-release of this movie on the big screen this year, I'm going to be ahead of the curb and bust out my VHS tape.
* Mulan- Fantastic movie, what else can I say?
The Hunchback of Notre Dame- One word; Hellfire.

That's it for today's totally random post. Talk to you all again someday. =P

Survey

1. EVER BEEN GIVEN AN ENGAGEMENT RING?
This question is silly. No.

2. LONGEST RELATIONSHIP?
None

3. LAST GIFT YOU RECEIVED?
Well my birthday was a few days ago (April 11th) and I got some money, a bike, Les Miserables on dvd, a ton of birthday cards, and A hula hoop! I am really thankful for everything and I really feel that I don't deserve that much. I really want to go bike riding but in Michigan it has been rainy and snowy and yucky the past few days so I haven't been able to yet. =(

4. EVER DROPPED A CELL PHONE?
YES. I am one of those people who should never be allowed to touch ANYTHING. 

5. WHEN'S THE LAST TIME YOU WORKED OUT?
Today. Hula Hoop!!! I'm pretty bad at it but I'm still practicing. 

6. THING(S) YOU SPEND A LOT OF MONEY ON?
Clothes, Books, and Drinkables (diet coke, tea, etc.)

7. LAST FOOD YOU ATE?
I'm eating a caramel apple sucker right now.

8. FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX?
Eyes, for some reason. 

9. ONE FAVORITE SONG?
I hate this question because it changes daily! Right now I'm loving Material Girl by Madonna.

10. WHERE DO YOU LIVE?
Somewhere over the rainbow

11. HIGH SCHOOL YOU ATTENDED:
A certain one in Michigan. 

12. CELL PHONE SERVICE PROVIDER:
Verizon.

13. FAVORITE MALL STORE:
I like many! 

14. LONGEST JOB YOU HAD?
N/A

15. DO YOU OWN A PAIR OF DICE?
The rolly polka dotted game thingys? Yes. 

16. DO YOU PRANK CALL PEOPLE?
That's dumb.

17. LAST WEDDING YOU ATTENDED:
I think it was for one of my cousins? I haven't been to a wedding in forever so I feel kind of bad about forgetting the last one. =(

18. FIRST FRIEND YOU'D CALL IF YOU WON THE LOTTERY:
Not really sure. 

19. LAST TIME YOU SAW YOUR BEST FRIEND
My old best friend I saw the last 4th of July. I don't really know wtf happened. 

20. FAVORITE FAST FOOD RESTAURANT:
Arby's. 

21. BIGGEST LIE YOU HAVE EVER HEARD:
"You are going to hell!"- multiple people. I don't think they really have a say in it.

23. WHERE'S YOUR FAVORITE PLACE TO EAT WITH FRIENDS?
I don't really care as long as I'm with friends. I never get invited places so...

24. CAN YOU COOK?
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! 

25. WHAT CAR DO YOU DRIVE?:
My moms silver grand am. 

26. BEST KISSER:
This isn't even a question and like I would know.

27. LAST TIME YOU CRIED?:
Never, I am not capable of such an action. =P 

28. MOST DISLIKED FOODS:
Pickles. Shrimp. CRANBERRY JUICE. 

29. THING YOU LIKE MOST ABOUT YOURSELF:
How creative I can be.

30. THING YOU DISLIKE MOST ABOUT YOURSELF:
I have problems communicating with others. Sometimes people have no idea what I'm talking about which can sometimes lead to embarrassment. 

32. LONGEST SHIFT YOU HAVE WORKED AT A JOB?:
N/A

33. FAVORITE MOVIE?
SWEENEY TODD. SWEENEY SWEENEY SWEENEY SWEENEY AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAHHHHHH.

34. CAN YOU SING?
Everyone can sing, some just better than others. I think I'm okay but not the best. 

35. LAST CONCERT ATTENDED?
Rachael Lampa. About 6 years ago. 

36. LAST KISS?
Lies and slander

37. LAST MOVIE RENTED:
The Artist. It was so good! By the way yes, I am still one of those people who go to the movie places and RENT things, no netflix for me and I really have no problem with that. 

38.ONE THING YOU NEVER LEAVE THE HOUSE WITHOUT:
Water.

39. FAVORITE VACATION SPOT:
I have loved everywhere that I have ever vacationed but California will always be near and dear to my little heart. 

43. LAPTOP OR DESKTOP COMPUTER?:
Both. AT THE SAME TIME. HAHAHAHA. I'M MULTI-TALENTED.

But really I only own a desktop. Laptops irritate me.

44. FAVORITE COMEDIAN?:
Craig Ferguson.

46. SLEEP WITH OR WITHOUT CLOTHES?
WITH. This is a strange question.

47. WHO SLEEPS WITH YOU EVERY NIGHT?:
My lonely heeeaaaart. =P

48. DO LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIPS WORK?:
They can. I have no doubt in my mind that they can work for certain people. 

49. HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU BEEN PULLED OVER BY THE POLICE?
Yesterday. I'm writing this blog from jail. LOL. 

50. PANCAKES OR FRENCH TOAST?
Oh I love both! I'm feeling pancake today though. 

51. DO YOU LIKE COFFEE?:
No.

52 HOW DO YOU LIKE YOUR EGGS?
In a scrambled fashion. 

53. DO YOU BELIEVE IN ASTROLOGY?:
I believe that people believe in it.

54. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?:
A solicitor. I was not interested in buying patio furniture. 

55. LAST PERSON ON YOUR MISSED CALL LIST?:
I shall assume another solicitor. 

56. WHAT WAS THE LAST TEXT MESSAGE YOU RECEIVED?:
My cousin sent me a Happy Birthday message. 

58. NUMBER OF PILLOWS?:
512!

59. WHAT ARE YOU WEARING RIGHT NOW?:
CLOTHES. 

60. PICK A LYRIC, ANY LYRIC:
Here I am
Not quite dying
My body left to rot in a hollow tree
Its branches throwing shadows
On the gallows for me
And the next day
And the next
And another day


61. WHAT KIND OF JELLY DO YOU LIKE ON YOUR PB & J?:
Grape. 

62. CAN YOU PLAY POOL?:
I can! Am I any good at it? No. 

63. CAN YOU SWIM?
YES! I love swimming. 

64. FAVORITE ICE CREAM?:
All of them. 

65. DO YOU LIKE MAPS?
I am quite fond of them. 

66. TELL ME A RANDOM FACT ABOUT YOURSELF:
I'm a GIRL.

68. EVER ATTEND A THEME PARTY?:
Sadly not. 

69. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SEASON
Spring!!! 

70. LAST TIME YOU LAUGHED AT SOMETHING STUPID?
About two minutes ago. 

71. WHAT TIME DID YOU WAKE UP THIS MORNING ?
1:00. I was sleepy. 

72. BEST THING ABOUT WINTER?:
Throwing snowballs at those little children across the street. They never know what hits them. 

73. LAST TIME A COP GAVE YOU A TICKET?:
Never

75. NAME OF YOUR FIRST PET?:
Fluffy.

76. DO YOU THINK PIRATES ARE COOL OR OVERRATED?
Pirates will always be cool. 

77. WHAT ARE YOU DOING THIS WEEKEND??
Having magical times.

78. BIRTHDAY?
April 11 

79. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE:
Actress/Voice actress

85. ARE YOU ON A LAPTOP?:
No sir I am not.

87. ARE YOU SMILING?:
I have no idea what my facial expression looks like right now. Maybe solemn?

89. DO YOU MISS SOMEONE RIGHT NOW?
No.

90. IF YOU COULD GO ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD WHERE WOULD YOU GO?
Today I'm feeling Ireland.

92. ARE YOU IN HIGH SCHOOL?:
NO. 

93. DO YOU HAVE A CRUSH?:
Lies and slander.

94. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE NAME?
The stupider the name the better. 

95. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR BATHING SUIT?:
A princess Jasmine type blue.

96. DOES YOUR SCHOOL START IN AUGUST?:
No.

97. DID YOU GO ON VACATION LAST MONTH?:
If you define vacation as "take one day to be completely useless" then yes

98. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON A CRUISE?:
No

99. DO YOU HAVE A SISTER:
No

100. ARE YOU UPSTAIRS?:
No

101. ARE YOU IN LOVE?:
No

102. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN THE HOSPITAL?
Yes. 

103. DO YOU WISH YOU COULD SEE ANYONE PARTICULAR RIGHT NOW?
Not really

104. WHAT JEWELRY ARE YOU WEARING?
Not any at the moment. 

105. WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO AFTER THIS SURVEY?
THINGS.