Telephone

You want to know what I am getting really tired of? People wanting to speak to me on the telephone about random things. Or random people talking to me on the telephone about important things. Either way, annoying telephone calls have been very annoying lately and it has taken me all that I have not to disconnect the telephone chord in our house.

Last night my mom's best friend called and her stupid grandchild wanted to talk to me on the phone which consisted of him screaming in my ear about the new spinney toy he got and then having air tone for 5 minutes. I'm almost positive I could have been doing something more productive than that. I don't like kids and this one just irritates me to no end. I don't want to speak to your best friends grandchild dearest mother. When I handed the phone back to her she started talking to her friend about how cute both me and the child were when we were "talking." NO. It was NOT cute, it was annoying and I swear if she ever makes me talk to that child on the phone again I am going to tear her arm off in a most violent fashion!
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Then today my asinine doctors office called about my labs. Let's see here, from what I can recall I went in to get them done on Friday but you're stupid office didn't fax them over. I know this because I got to speak to a new worker there and dumb and dumber seemed to have forgotten that their fax machine was broken so the labs didn't get sent and I had to wait 45 freaking minutes until they even got me back in the registration room only to find out that the laboratory where I always get my blood drawn did not receive them meaning they couldn't poke a needle into my arm.
Dumb was the person I spoke to on the phone today and the conversation went something like this;
Me: Hello.
Dumb: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA (I really couldn't tell you what was so funny. Let me tell you it is really quite disturbing to pick up a phone and then have someone laughing in your ear.) HIIIIII. We have your labs.
Me: O-k.
Dumb: Do you have a good answer or a bad answer for us? (I don't even know what that's supposed to mean! I'm getting my blood drawn for my A1C and it's never been over 7.6!)
Me: ...I don't know?
My mom in the background: TELL HER WHAT HAPPENED WITH YOUR LABS!!!!!! (crazy dumb girl is laughing her @ss off in the background for some reason)
Me: Well I couldn't get my lab work done because you guys failed to send the papers over requesting it.
Her: When did you GOOOOOO?
Me: Last Friday.
Her: AHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA. You're appointment is on THURSDAY.
Me: Yeah I was planning on going in Tuesday to get the done if the paperwork is there.
Her: It was YOUR labs fault, NOT OURS!
Me: No it wasn't their fault. You failed to send the papers over because your fax machine was broken.
Her: I didn't know that! (How can you not know that? I know that and I don't even work there!) What lab do you go to?
Me: >Labs name<
Her: We always have PROBLEMS with that lab. I'll send your papers somewhere else.
At this point I'm literally just going WTF, you are planning to send my lab slips somewhere else and not going to inform me of the location or even ask if that's what I want? Go to hell.
Me: No you can just send them over to >Lab's name< because I don't live anywhere closer to get my lab work done. I'll see you on Thursday.
Her: AHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA OKAY  BYEEE.

How is she not fired yet? And my mom kept screaming at me afterwards for being so rude. I don't see how I was rude in any way, shape, or form except in my mind.
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Then my aunt decides it would be fun to call my house right after that.

Aunt: Hi
Me: Hey how are you doing?
Aunt: Do you own the Twilight movies?
Me: No. No I do not.
Aunt: That sucks cuz I was planning to go out with my girlfriends tonight and see the last movie but I haven't seen the one where Bella get's pregnant yet!
--I don't care. Truly, I don't. Why do people automatically think that just because I'm a girl that I recognize Twilight as a thing? I really cannot stand the franchise and wish it would go away forever. 
Me: I know the last one is out dvd now. Maybe you can rent it.
Aunt: No I'll probably buy it because I can't get enough of the series. I'm obsessed with it!
--My aunt in 48 years old. This can not be healthy.
Aunt: What team are you on? Edward or Jacob?
Me: Team guy who almost hit Bella with a car.
Aunt: YOU DON'T LIKE BELLA?
Me: I really dislike Twilight in general...
Aunt: No wonder you don't have friends. Girls your age should be into Twilight.
--Should they? I never knew it was a truth universally acknowledged. But never the less I would rather be hit by a bus than read or watch any of those books or movies ever again.
Aunt: You should go see the last movie, you'll change your mind.
Me: I doubt it.
Aunt: I'M GOING TO SCREAM THROUGH THE PHONE ABOUT HOW YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO HAVE AN OPINION UNLESS IT IS THE SAME AS MINE!
Me: I have to go *hangs up phone*

Why? Can anyone out there answer that for me? Just why?