Saturday, June 8, 2013

Idiots on Facebook, Round 4

If you are not aware of what this is then here are the rules;
Basically I go on someones profile on Facebook and if their status is horribly non-sensible I will copy and paste their status right here. There is only one way to not get involved with this game; make your profile private or type like a normal human being. If you choose not to follow these rules you are fair game.

Classy! A dueschbag stole my garage to wheel it behind car down the road! I heard ya stop luckly the gun was a few steps away or I would have blew your end of your car out duesbag! #wrong house to be fing with, LOCKED & LOADED!!- Something tells me this guy is not legally qualified for owning a weapon of any sort. However, I am very curious as to how a person can steal a garage, put the garage in his car, and then drive with the garage down the road. Please, tell me how one can even lift a garage.  

Party at mcdonolds & bears tonight!!!! Come on! ! Anything fun!!- Bears do like McDonalds parties. And HUMAN FLESH. 

Anybody have a jet ski for sale??? Ill buy it now time! Just wanna be on a lake and my boat isnt ready yet!!!!- I can somewhat comprehend what this guy is saying.  But there will never be an excuse for "buy it now time." Even if the sentence said "I can buy it on time" that would still make no sense considering what he says after that.

Chillin slamming down bloody marrys w/ lovely n my muther.- That's nice. I do believe he is calling his girlfriend his lovely. Classy youngster.

Woo woo one year probation for my dui...non check, $5000 later but still get to leave state for CEADER POINT SATURDAY in Idoho! Guess I gotta quit drinking- Yes. Yes I would recommend that you do need to stop your alcohol consumption. Why? Because I'm guessing your probation officer would not dig it and because you are traveling quite a few states away from where Cedar Point is located. 

Wht u got ur ass in trouble. I jus got off probation- Why is everyone on/off probation? Stop doing illegal things! 

Alright  huricane rain storm its damn hard to start a fuuuuuuckie!!!- Ah the good ole' hurricane rain storm. Who in their right mind would think about going outside and trying to start a fire during something like this? I can see bad things happening if this guy is allowed to be within 6 yards of any matches.

Ur better off not to lie in the long run no matter wut u did the truth will make it rite- Thank you Mother Theresa. I enjoy how this is supposed to be a message of some sort but it is basically just trying to boss people around. "You BETTER off not lie." I will BETTER whatever I want. I will better butter. Bam! 

These are all from the same girl: if i had some1 would go pick up Dran i would let them win in a card game its hard 2 beat me on ur own-

1. Dran is a stupid name. It's like his parents combined Draco Malfoy and dragon and turned it into a child.
2. I could probably kick this girls butt in her rousing game of Go Fish!
3. Why do people feel the need to not capitalize the letter I? I do not accept this. 

Ugh,.. I am sick with a cold. I really wished my baby could come and make it all better- So from what I understand she is saying that if her honey bunches of oats was there she would feel better by contaminating him with her sickness. Right on!

He was and is my true love. was with him a week and two days. - Yeah, being with someone 12 days automatically means that person is your true love. 

Guy- DO I KNOW YOU? (I am your worst nightmare.) 
Her- No But i am jays women n i am tryin 2 call him so i can call him. tell him to call me. (She is like 17. Not a woman yet. Also I enjoy how she wishes to call this person because calling this person means she'll call this person. =/) 
Guy- I don't know anyone named Jay. (But I added you as a friend because I don't know anything about photoshop and from your profile picture you look like a Rootbeer model!) 
Her- I wished i could meet u cuz u sound fun like me (Let this just speak for itself.)

That's all for now but I am sure plenty of other silly jelly beans will post something stupid in the future. Thanks for reading! 

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