Thursday, August 23, 2012

South

I just got back from Mississippi. Me and my mom just took a 'vacation' there to see one of her friends the 18th and got back yesterday at 9pm. And let me just say I have no future plans of moving southward. I really REALLY appreciate being a Yankee now that I had to go down there. 99% of the people were super sweet and nice but for six straight days I had to bottle up my thoughts and use lots of sarcasm to make sure I didn't strangle anyone.

Day by day events;
The Beginning;
We get to our hotel. BEST HOTEL EVER. It had a HUGE swimming pool and basically swimming is the only thing I had yet to do this summer which is a shame considering at my old house we had an outdoor pool and I used to go swimming all of the time. The thing about this pool was that the outdoor one was connected to the indoor one. There was a sign that said not to swim under or over this little window thing that connected the two pools but that was stupid so I broke the rules!!! The hotel also served little snackys if you showed them your room key and although the snacks were completely bought from the dollar store I didn't complain because they were free and it was just a nice thing for them to do for their guests.

Day 1:
Left the hotel and shuttled to  the Detroit airport and for once there wasn't a crazy person screaming at us at security to TAKE OFF OUR SHOES AND BELTS AND WATCHES and what not. However I did get asked three times how old I was by security even by the lady who was supposed to be checking my ID.

We then got on the plane where we were sitting across from a guy who lived in Pakistan half of his life and a man in the military, it was a picture to see let me tell you. Mr. Military guy was told to move and sit by the exit row but apparently this was his first time flying so he had to move again because the plane people did not trust him with our lives. =/

We finally arrived in Mississippi and we had to wait a freaking hour before my moms friend, her husband, and her grandson picked us up. Apparently they didn't know where we were (even after calling and telling them beforehand that we were at gate 6) and they parked about a mile downwards in the parking garage. I felt like being a nice person and gave the freaking grandson candy-my mistake. Most annoying kid ever. I despise kids with a passion but after this trip it made me hate them even more.
Seriously every 5 seconds this kid was like "Lookyut me! I knowz how to shoot a bow and arrow and ride a swing!" No kid, you aren't showing me anything fantastic, shut up and go play on the 111 freeway.
This kid had no discipline what so ever and it really pissed me off. I'm against child abuse because I was hit a lot as a kid but with this six year old I thought he just needed to get punched in the face.
Example;
Mom: Grandma said you can't go in the pool because you were getting a cold.
Him: I aint gonna listen to heeeeeeerr
Mom: You're going to get in trouble
Him: No I ain't (jumps in the pool-doesn't get in trouble)


Day 2-
Me,my mom, and my moms friend go shopping. Stupid kid says he was going to come with us. He wasn't even supposed to come back over until the day we left. Thank God he wasn't up in time or the only fun part about the trip would have been ruined. Kohls had a lot of cool shirts but everything was an xs and sadly that is not something I can even fit my breasts into. We also went to Old Navy which was fun considering all the Old Navy's near me closed down and I kind of missed their flip flops. Lol.

I also think this was the day where I started to find out about my love of Diet Dr. Pepper.

Later in the evening when we got home I find out stupid six year old kid ate my freaking pop rocks. There are certain rules I have when it comes to my personal items, don't touch them! But that is ok considering I bought some bubble gum pop rocks at Old Navy for 99 cents (first time I ever tried them, I didn't really read the wrapper which said that it turned into gum so that was a surprise)  I was going to give him the grape ones but now he gets nothing!

The kid then starts trying to tell me what to do and starts punching me for no damn reason what so ever. Grandma starts saying "Not to do that" but she sucks at being threatening. I swear I started getting mean at that point and I don't even care. I was about ready to drown the stupid little mofo in the swimming pool.

Day 3-
Me and my mom get our hair done by my moms friend. I swear she cut my hair crooked.
We sat out by a little bonfire and chatted and laughed and what not. My mom's friends husband is hilarious. I got eaten by a billion mosquitoes and as of right now I am still trying to stop itching.

Day 4- We (myself, my mom, her friend, and her husband) went to the beach. I dislike beaches immensely but this one was a lot better than a lot I have ever been to and you could see the bottom which was neat even if blue gills were swimming in the water near us. I plastered myself with SPF 100 sunscreen about 5 times and I still managed to get burnt and a little tan. I think I am the only girl in the world who dislikes looking tan, tan skin just doesn't suit me very well. Neither does red lobster skin either but I doubt that color suits a lot of people.
After that we went back to the friends house or what was our "home" for a few days and and I took a nap. It was quite eventful!

Day 5-
Not much really went on that day, we went to Sonic and I got a Butterfinger blast which was the most delicious thing in the world. I also got a hamburger which was also spectacularly good. There are basically no Sonic's in Michigan so it's always nice to go there whenever a place has one. We also stopped at a beautiful antique store and a Piggly Wiggly which is basically like a grocery store in the south. We the had to go to my moms friend's friend's furniture store who we met only a few days ago and print off our boarding passes to go home the next day.

Stupid kid came over and almost hit me with a bloody baseball bat and started crying because he doesn't know what a foul ball is.

My mom's friend's step father came over later that day and made the best ribs I have ever had in my entire life. Among the people at the house was my moms friend's friend who is super awesome and who we printed the boarding passes from along with the bastard child.

Now this is where I finally lost it. My moms friend has a son (awesomest person in the entire world, he's kind of like a brother to me) who was working later that night and who has a dog that was staying at their house for the week until he moved back in. Cutest little dog ever but it was very small. Stupid kid puts it in a basket and starts shaking it. Puppy starts crying. I tell him to let the dog go. He sits on the basket and through the little hole you can see the puppy basically crying. He opens the basket and puts a sheet over the dog's head and says "I'm going to suffocate it!" I go tell my moms friend what a little inconvenience he's being and she says "As long as the dog isn't whining she's good!" No, the dog has been whining for a few minutes but you have been talking and I do not enjoy this. The stupid kid then has to go do his homework and leaves the dog for a second before I hold onto her. Stupid kid then comes back and starts hitting me trying to get her out of my arms and put her in the basket again. I took the dog and locked her and me in the room I had and he starts crying to grandma about how I hit him. As much as I dislike you kid I never laid a hand on you. Thank God my moms friend (or 'grandma') didn't believe him.

 I don't like it when people hurt animals, it just get's me sad and irritated. The dog did not seem to approve of it either because she scratched the kids eye later that evening.

Day 6-
We had to get up and drive to the airport. My moms friend's mom drove us and she is probably the coolest person ever. She tells it the way it is and I respect her lots for that. However I did find out that my mom has been hiding a secret from me about a past marriage thanks to the mom. Respect has now been lost for my mother.

At the airport we said our goodbyes and for the first time ever we checked our bags outside which was pretty cool. The guy with the crazy name didn't lose our luggage or anything even if the TSA did choose to search our suitcase for a procedure or whatever.

The security at this airport was very chill compared to Detroit but the line took forever to get through. The security I think tried to look insanely tough and serious but it was more laughable than anything because I could probably outrun 80% of them.
At the airport they had little shops where I bought my water and a restaurant where me and my mom ate before our flight. The airport also had a bookstore that was selling classics incredibly cheap and where I was finally able to pick up a copy of "A Tale of Two Cities" for $4.00.

When we got to our section before we were able to board a girl with a computer started screaming at some video game. I told my mom that this was the girl who would be sitting next to us. I was correct! Her,her brother, and her mom sat diagonally a row in front of us! The girl screaming at the video game, come to find out, was more than likely autistic. As soon as the plane left the ground she started freaking out and 15 minutes before it landed she started freaking out again. It kind of made the entire plane uncomfortable and made me feel unsafe.

When the plane landed in Detroit my grandmother and her boyfriend were supposed to pick us up but instead of staying with the car my grandmother had to flaunt herself. Guess who got a shiny yellow ticket for not reading the NO PARKING signs?


 I am glad to be back even if I am extremely tired, my face has a zillion zits on it, my hair is uneven, and my legs itch like crazy.

List of things I now despise;
- Stupid kids even more than before
- Stupid terms the stupid kid said like "frog youuuu" (aka punched me in the freaking head) and 'meep beep.'
- People getting in my personal space. If you can touch my elbow you are too close.
- Being 'proud' of everything which is a word now used in replacement of happy
- Van Halen and Vince Gill. Vince Gill mostly. God I hate Vince Gill.

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