Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Valentine's Day Suck Curse Strikes Again!

Music: The Water Is Wide by Hayley Westenra

I hope everyone who does not have my curse had a wonderful day today!

I got up extremely unrested this morning and like I mentioned yesterday whenever a thought of being cautious on this holiday happens and I forget about my wise advice, something bad always happens. EVERY TIME on this date! So as I was walking up the little sidewalk to the college this morning at 7:40 (early like my teacher told us to be so we could listen to the author talk about his bread making experience ) as I was about ready to open the door some sorry excuse of a teenager decides it would be convivial to open the door 100 miles an hour in an angry way and hit me in the face with it before I could even blink. This idiot didn't even have the decency to say "I'm sorry" or "Here, let me pay the medical bill for your face which I just severely bruised!" No, instead this guy looks at me for 2 or so seconds and proceeds to walk briskly towards the parking lot.

Before the author came in I started conversing with these two ladies who I thought seemed cool at first until they mentioned how they hate reading unless it's Twilight. "Team Edward for the win!" one of them screamed out of absolutely nowhere. They were nice enough people at first but this is when I decided to go into the auditorium after grabbing some delicious free orange juice, provided only for us unlucky kids who were forced to listen to this author man speak.

Unfortunately for me one of these Twilight girls sat near me and assumed it would be neat to tell me what her plans with her boyfriend were for Valentine's Day, proceeding to show me a picture of said boyfriend on her cell phone. By the way (off topic) why do most girls and guys wish to show you a picture of their significant other? What exactly am I supposed to say? Every answer will be wrong, for it's either;
A. He/she is cute/pretty- Saying this results in long stories about their love life which I don't want to hear and 99% of the time my opinion on their cuteness is untrue.
B. They look like they got hit by a bus! - Rude answer and will also result in a long conversation about what a fantastic person they are.
Now the best answer I learned is;
 C. You two make a great couple! - Yes this may possibly a lie but it works!
If I have never met your boyfriend or girlfriend I do not have an opinion about them. Looks can only tell so much and I honestly find it kind of shallow when a person wants anothers opinion on their romantic companion, your opinion should be the only one that matters if you really like them.

Alright, end of off topicness. So Twilight girl sits next to me, shows me a picture of her boyfriend whilst telling me detailed information on how they will spend their evening and then carries on by claiming that she used to smoke tons of pot and only does this once in awhile now because she has a child. I think that deserves parent of the year award. 0_o

Before she could continue her mindless babbling Mr. Author guy stands up in front of the auditorium and introduces himself in the following way;
"Whattup hazardous college goers! My name's ____ and I'm here to talk to you all about my cool and fresh book!"
Me: Hazardous. College. Goers. Where'd I put that arsenic?

This guy tells us that he's now 62 years of age and spends the entire hour and a half reading his mediocre writing, trying to get us to buy his books, saying "therapeutic" every 10 seconds, saying nonsensical big words every 50, describing how he's a blue collar, and explaining to us the process of making bread the old country way. I always thought it would be fun to make bread but listening to a speech on how to make bread properly is beyond dull unless you are in a cooking class.

He then continues to try and get down on our level in a most creepy way! Examples include;
"Epic fail guy!"- towards the kid who stood up to get his coat that fell off the back of his chair.
"Oh Em Gee gally"- towards a PROFESSOR who asked a question. Technically the only people asking questions were the teaching staff.
I'm sure he said more teen slang words but once he started on a tangent about how to be a successful writer and a hot journalist I started losing interest and singing "Chim chiminey chim chiminey chim chim cher-ee! A sweep is as lucky as lucky can be!" in my head.

Sadly I felt really bad for this dude after awhile because he tried to keep telling us jokes and wanted us to laugh with him despite the fact that his jokes were about as funny as a news broadcast on world peace. As an example to this guys horrid jokes, he was telling us about his story on "how his pup took a coyot (coyote?) from the barn!" and some girl sneezed. His joke; "Are yoooouuuu allergic to dog hair?" AHAHAHAHAHA! That's a spleen killer!

I felt even more bad when the board member lady who provided us with the yummy orange juice was sitting directly in front of me and kept laughing 24/7 whenever the author was trying to talk or trying to make a point. I swear he and her probably hooked up in the past.

To end this day Mr. Author read us a story about love because it was Valentine's Day.
"This girl in my college days broke my heart... and it never mended. I'm still not over her smiling cheeks, she broke me pretty bad."  Good for her! I can completely understand why she broke up with you because you are a total fruit cake!

Overall I am now more determined to continue writing my own book considering it obviously can't be that difficult if this mediocre dunce got a few published!

After that lovely time I went to my theatre class which was really fun today. The girl who barely speaks any English read her story aloud to the class and she is hilarious and I cannot wait to work with her on the skit we all shall be doing in April. Our teacher then showed us some clips from The Lion King on Broadway and apparently I was the only person in that class who has seen it on stage! Anyone who is reading this right now if you can only see one show in your lifetime I strongly STRONGLY recommend The Lion King. It has to be the best show I've ever seen live and I would definitely see it again in a heartbeat.
Some kid in my class though had to be stupid and complain about how "THEY ARE USING SONGS FOR THE 2ND LION KING, NOT THE FIRST!!!!" It's a Broadway show cretin , songs are bound to be added. Also if you payed attention, you would realize that the show actually does use songs from the first movie as well.

Oh and a little something I learned about The Lion King on Broadway today; circles are used in every scene to represent the circle of life. Mufasa's mask is a circle, the watering hole is a circle, etc. I just thought that was really neat.

After that class, I went to art against my will and I am happy that I didn't skip it today which I was seriously contemplating. We got to actually do something fun! When I say fun I mean that today everyone got to use drawing and coloring utensils! It may seem silly to you, but being in this class listening to boring lecture after boring lecture this completely trumped everything in the past classes.

Now the only thing that irritated me about that class today was;
A. Two kids sitting infront of me kept giggling about their boyfriends and what they plan to do on their very first V- Day! *head desk*
B. Crazy teacher lady told us that for 5 extra credit points we could write about the artistic elements in the movie Pans Labyrinth. I need all the extra credit I can get for that class but some student had to be a perfect example of why 85% of the human race is stupid and raise their hand to ask, "Isn't that movie all in Spanish?"
The crazy art teacher told him yes and that although you can listen to the dubbed version in english watching it with subtitles makes the movie a lot better and less irritating  which I can completely understand considering I've seen plenty of movies where the english voices were cringe worthy, Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon being one example. This kid then starts complaining on how hard it is to read and watch things at the same time which led to half of the class complaining about watching this movie for extra credit!!! So crazy teacher asks the class if anyone has ever seen a movie with subtitles before and only one person besides myself raised their hand. Now instead of encouraging these students to experience something new she scrubs the entire extra credit assignment. Thanks kids.

As for my musical rehearsal tonight, this is where I broke down. I was not feeling very spifadocious today so obviously I'm not going to be 150% at rehearsal but I was still trying and give it everything I had! On complete accident I skipped over some guys line because he kept taking a long pause break between his sentences and I got yelled at for that. After going through the first and second scenes the director told me that I was going to now be voicing over the role of the nurse considering the girl they cast beforehand quit. Now I was totally happy about doing that until five minutes later when he told me "Hey, we're giving the nurse to guy who takes long pauses between sentances because he's going into voiceover." Are you effing kidding me? Um how the hell can someone be that oblivious? I WROTE ON MY FREAKING RESUME AT AUDITIONS THAT I AM CAPABLE AND GOING IN TO VOICE OVER. WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AM?!?!? Then if that wasn't bad enough for my self confidence, all the songs the music instructor/director told me to sing along with at rehearsal because I was in those scenes made me hate people a little more because at the last minute director dude tells me I'm not needed for those scenes and that I wasn't needed for the rest of the week after watching the rest of rehearsal with people singing and being in scenes that were supposed to include ME. At this point I was so upset that I took a little stroll around the school, found a chair, and cried my eyes out for atleast five minutes. Like always nobody seemed to notice which I was a bit grateful for this time.

After going back to the auditorium for the next half hour, I got a ride home from my dad who kind of got it out of me what happened at rehearsal. I told him that cutting people from ensemble acts they've been cast in was a part of theatre. I'm not really sure if that's really true, but saying that was more for myself rather than anyone else, lying to myself sometimes helps me not go on a screaming rampage.

But hopefully everyone else out there had a fabulous chocolate appreciation day!

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