Right now it is nearly 3:00 am where I live. I have only been asleep for 2 FREAKING HOURS! Why is that? I've mentioned multiple times that I have insomnia so sleep is hard to come by but I am also a light sleeper so if anything wakes me up before the designated alarm clock time I get very mad.
Well at precisely 2:00 this fine morning I get a text message from some girl who I took a college class with telling me to call her back ASAP. So I go outside and do so and on the other end this girl sounds drunk and wants to receive help and advise on what to do when diabetics pass out from their drunkenness and their sugars go up to 500.
Me: Um does this girl have any insulin with her?
Girl: Like a needle? She has one but I already poked her with it and she isn't coming out of it. WHAT DO I DO?!?!?
Me: 450 is not the end of the world, she shall survive! First off stop poking her with the needle it isn't going to help unless she has a vial of some sort or a pen.
Girl: Like an ink pen? WTF WILL THAT DO?
-Ok obviously this girl does not have an insulin pen. Noted.-
Me: Does she have a vial of some sort with something in it that looks like water?
Girl: YEAAAAAHHH.
Me: What's the name on the bottle say?
Girl: Nov-OH-LOG
Me: There are numbers on the needle. Give her 15 units. Stab her in the stomach.
*waits a few minutes, hears another girl puking in the background...again*
Girl: That it?
Me: Yeah but keep an eye on her. I'm not sure what her insulin dose usually is so she could drop, in which case orange juice always helps.
Stupid Diabetic Girl: I got the car so the car keys are driving!
Me: 0_o Oh and she shouldn't drive. That's EXTREMELY DANGEROUS!
Girl: Thanks Tiff, bye!
And she hangs up on me. I hope I helped somewhat but I swear to God if "Tiff" get's credit for not having the stupid drunken diabetic girl hospitalized I am going to be madder than I already am. I'm not so mad at the college girl for calling me for help and getting my name wrong but rather the stupid diabetic for being so stupid. Diabetics should not have more than two drinks. EVERY DOCTOR TELLS YOU THAT! Apparently this girl had seven drinks which amazes me that her sugars weren't higher than 500. Moron.
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Saturday, May 5, 2012
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
The Fear
Music: The Fear- Lily Allen
I am not a person to ever admit what I am afraid of. I learned in the past that admitting your fears tends to make people use them against you and that is precisely why when asked I tell people that I don't have any which is a complete lie.
My biggest fear? Spiders.
In the past 24 hours I have seen SIX count it SIX spiders. Last night one was on the computer room's wall. I hit it with a magazine after almost having a heart attack. Apparently Mr. Scary Spider didn't want to meet death yet so instead of dying like a normal spider it decided it would be fun to hang out on the computer cords behind the desk.
Finally I had to get my flashlight out so I could see the little loser and murder it but it moved onto an area I couldn't reach so instead of death, Mr. Spider had to face a screaming 21 year old and a slamming door.
TONIGHT after I let my dog back into the house another Mr.Spider decided to follow my dog back in! It was VERY LARGE! AND EVIL! It went under the kitchen cupboards which is an unreachable place and caused me to scream and freak out. Luckily this spider wasn't very smart so he came out after 5 minutes, probably annoyed by my screaming and I smooshed it with a sandal! Take that evil spider!
What exactly is the point of this post you may ask? Admitting my fear and to inform the internet that spiders are little demons.
I am not a person to ever admit what I am afraid of. I learned in the past that admitting your fears tends to make people use them against you and that is precisely why when asked I tell people that I don't have any which is a complete lie.
My biggest fear? Spiders.
In the past 24 hours I have seen SIX count it SIX spiders. Last night one was on the computer room's wall. I hit it with a magazine after almost having a heart attack. Apparently Mr. Scary Spider didn't want to meet death yet so instead of dying like a normal spider it decided it would be fun to hang out on the computer cords behind the desk.
TONIGHT after I let my dog back into the house another Mr.Spider decided to follow my dog back in! It was VERY LARGE! AND EVIL! It went under the kitchen cupboards which is an unreachable place and caused me to scream and freak out. Luckily this spider wasn't very smart so he came out after 5 minutes, probably annoyed by my screaming and I smooshed it with a sandal! Take that evil spider!
What exactly is the point of this post you may ask? Admitting my fear and to inform the internet that spiders are little demons.
Sunday, April 29, 2012
She's BAAAACKKK!
Many MANY people have heard of the infamous Tara Gilesbie. If not, lucky you! Tara Gilesbie is known for writing a terrible Harry Potter fanfic titled My Immortal under the name xXxbloodyristsxXx.
Well said author under that name has created two more stories for our enjoyment! Now I'm almost positive it's a Tara impersonator but the author has her writing style down so we can overlook that!
Behold, TWO NEW STORIES from the best author ever!
http://www.fanfiction.net/u/3398015/xXxbloodyristsxXx
I will admit that I am a big fan of terrible fanfiction. Nothing in the world makes me laugh as hard as writers making terrible stories with horrid spelling mistakes and adding in random things to make their story sound more believable. Because of Tara's new stories I am influenced to continue my commentary on fanfiction.net on My Immortal just so I can start in on the new ones!
Now I shall leave you to read the stories, I am not responsible for any tears of blood you may cry while reading these.
Well said author under that name has created two more stories for our enjoyment! Now I'm almost positive it's a Tara impersonator but the author has her writing style down so we can overlook that!
Behold, TWO NEW STORIES from the best author ever!
http://www.fanfiction.net/u/3398015/xXxbloodyristsxXx
I will admit that I am a big fan of terrible fanfiction. Nothing in the world makes me laugh as hard as writers making terrible stories with horrid spelling mistakes and adding in random things to make their story sound more believable. Because of Tara's new stories I am influenced to continue my commentary on fanfiction.net on My Immortal just so I can start in on the new ones!
Now I shall leave you to read the stories, I am not responsible for any tears of blood you may cry while reading these.
Things Children Should Grow Up With/Know
I live across the street from a daycare center. Now usually I tend to just avoid whatever goes on there because I could seriously care less and have better things to do than stalk little 5 year olds. 0_o
However today I was up in my room writing when some class from the daycare went outside and started talking obnoxiously LOUD about what they learned today. My daycare was pretty darn horrendous but thank God we never had to do stuff like that because my response would have more than likely have been "I learned I hate all of you!"
All of the kids said something about how "I learned how to count to 10!" or something like that. Good, counting is important. Then the teacher lady told them that they could go home and that tomorrow they would be watching Pocahontas. None of the kids had any idea what or who that was. Yes, the Disney movie is historically inaccurate but that's no excuse to NOT have your kids watch the movie or teach them about her!
So that lead me to an important question. What should children grow up with and know so they don't become the next cast of The Jersey Shore?
What I came up with;
1. Barbie/Power Rangers/ Legos or some toy they can be obsessed with
2. Disney movies!- And I don't mean WALL-E. I mean the classic Disney; Cinderella, Snow White, The Lion King, The Aristocats, Aladdin, Mulan, etc.
3. Know the continents,oceans, great lakes, the states capitals, general geography.
4. Know what the Holocaust is.
5. Coloring books or anything that makes the child be creative
6. Jumprope or anything that makes the child active
7. Know that the Titanic was an actual event and not just a movie
8. Know their state flower and reptile and all that jazz
9. Know the Pledge of Allegiance and National Anthem
10. Manners and politeness
11. How to count money
12. Pacman/ Mario
13. That putting plastic in the microwave is a bad idea
14. Know that the Edmund Fitzgerald was also an actual event and not just a song
15. Fairy tales or any other type of story
16. David Bowie/The Beatles =P
If anyone comes up with anything else (for I am sure I missed a lot) you can comment below!
However today I was up in my room writing when some class from the daycare went outside and started talking obnoxiously LOUD about what they learned today. My daycare was pretty darn horrendous but thank God we never had to do stuff like that because my response would have more than likely have been "I learned I hate all of you!"
All of the kids said something about how "I learned how to count to 10!" or something like that. Good, counting is important. Then the teacher lady told them that they could go home and that tomorrow they would be watching Pocahontas. None of the kids had any idea what or who that was. Yes, the Disney movie is historically inaccurate but that's no excuse to NOT have your kids watch the movie or teach them about her!
So that lead me to an important question. What should children grow up with and know so they don't become the next cast of The Jersey Shore?
What I came up with;
1. Barbie/Power Rangers/ Legos or some toy they can be obsessed with
2. Disney movies!- And I don't mean WALL-E. I mean the classic Disney; Cinderella, Snow White, The Lion King, The Aristocats, Aladdin, Mulan, etc.
3. Know the continents,oceans, great lakes, the states capitals, general geography.
4. Know what the Holocaust is.
5. Coloring books or anything that makes the child be creative
6. Jumprope or anything that makes the child active
7. Know that the Titanic was an actual event and not just a movie
8. Know their state flower and reptile and all that jazz
9. Know the Pledge of Allegiance and National Anthem
10. Manners and politeness
11. How to count money
12. Pacman/ Mario
13. That putting plastic in the microwave is a bad idea
14. Know that the Edmund Fitzgerald was also an actual event and not just a song
15. Fairy tales or any other type of story
16. David Bowie/The Beatles =P
If anyone comes up with anything else (for I am sure I missed a lot) you can comment below!
Monday, April 23, 2012
Worst Movies Ever
These are the worst movies I have ever had the misfortune of seeing. Or just movies I dislike. Either way all of the horrible ones are on this list and if they are not then I have probably never seen the film or disagree with what you think is awful. Now onward to the list!
My Name is Zorra-Me and my english class watched this my freshmen year when my teacher went on the senior trip and some ignoramous of a sub guy forced us to watch it. I couldn't even tell you what the movie was about considering it was so IMBECILIC and based on a $2 budget and people who couldn't act to save their lives. The entire movie revolved around these horrid actors performing scenes from the writings of Zora Neale Hurston ON A STAGE. I think the only thing I got out of it was something about some African American woman going to the devil because she was hooch-ish and hated her life.
But the thing that got me the most confused and irritated was that these actors were performing this stuff on a bloody stage! Possibly in front of the public! It is one thing to record stage productions if they are good, but this thing greatly insulted the theatre, actors who actually know how to act without "tlkin lyk fuulss" to enunciate or get the point across, not to mention the works of a dead writer.
Marie Antoinette- I loved the costumes and girly surroundings and found the film visually stunning. I always have liked the history surrounding Marie Antoinette and think Kirsten Dunst is a pretty good actress. So why did I despise this film and want everyone to choke on a piece of cake? To put it simply it was stupid and pointless and it's not a good adaptation of her life what so ever. To put it bluntly this movie makes Marie look like a whore, And she had a tragic life and Hollywood yet again fails to show any of that. She doesnt even get her head chopped off. The main plot of the movie: get up, get dressed, eat sugar, have sex, go to sleep. I swear half of the time I wasn't sure if it was a comedy or if I should fall asleep. The movie is like The Producer's Springtime for Hitler only not as creative or fun.
The Wave-I had to watch this sophmore year in US history and it was just so stupid that you couldnt help but laugh. I suggest everyone goes and look it up on youtube right now because you cannot explain this movie, you have to experience it! It is actually based on a real life story that is taken to a new level with the horrid actors. Honestly it has a good message but a bad delivery.
Finding Forester- A movie about some kid who plays 'b-ball' and wants to write to impress higher class students.Can you say waste of 5 minutes of my life? And yet I was forced to watch it 3 DIFFERENT TIMES in my high school because it had a "positive message" which had something to do with following your heart to get out of the slums. I believe Oprah had a similiar episode to this entire movie with real life people and how they made something out of their life after living in poor areas in New York and by stopping the drive bys! I think this was the movie where I started counting ceiling tiles in my movie appreciation class.
We are Marshall- It's a football movie, of course I hated it. Because as everyone knows football can be used as a metaphor for life. It's based on a true story about some football team that dies in a plane crash and then they have a coach that tries to be funny but isn't because his name is Matthew McConaughey. The movie lacked realism and 99% of the film had the actors crying.
School Ties- Some stupid movie about some COLLEGE KIDS who have issues and an HONOR CODE and some lame professor who says SOMEONE CHEATED SO YOU ALL FAIL! I am pretty sure its illegal to do that. Oh and they randomly sing songs about cafes!
Secondhand LIONS-Two words DEFEND YOURSELF! lol. *facepalm*
The Whale Rider- I mainly didn't like it because I didn't understand it. It was about some Maori girl and her perverted grandpa who tells kids to STICK THEIR TONGUE OUT BECAUSE IF YOU DO THAT THEN IT MEANS IM GOING TO EAT YOU! and to SLAP THEIR CHESTS UNTIL THEY BLEED! And the lead girl sings songs at random moments and it gets annoying really fast.Whats worse is this movie isn't even about WHALES until the end!
Powder-Seriously who in there right mind wrote this move again, oh thats right they HAD NO MIND TO BEGIN WITH! The movie is about some kid whos paler then an albino who has TELEKINETIC POWERS and then gets struck by lightening then magically disappears into the sky when a cop chases them. Yeah thats the end of the movie,sounds great huh?
Aeon Flux- I didnt even understand the point of it. I think it was supposed to be about some girl with superpowers? I dunno. I didnt even finish it because it was pure stupidity.
Flash Gordon- Now I didn't watch this one by choice. Practically all of the movies I listed were not by choice. Oh no, I was forced to watch this or Spiderman for a humanities class. This is just rofl worthy. Timothy Dalton you could have done so much better than this!
Avatar- That's right you read correctly. It's a nature worship claptrap and the plot line and characters sucked and they had no depth whatsoever
The Conqueror- John Wayne as Genghis Khan. Someone needs to get shot for that casting choice!!!
Movies So Bad, I Can Tell Without Even Seeing Them
Anything Will Ferrell is in.
Anything with Adam Sandler. But he can feel free to sing the Hanukkah song year round.
Bruno
Borat
Flash Gordon- Now I didn't watch this one by choice. Practically all of the movies I listed were not by choice. Oh no, I was forced to watch this or Spiderman for a humanities class. This is just rofl worthy. Timothy Dalton you could have done so much better than this!
Avatar- That's right you read correctly. It's a nature worship claptrap and the plot line and characters sucked and they had no depth whatsoever
The Conqueror- John Wayne as Genghis Khan. Someone needs to get shot for that casting choice!!!
Movies So Bad, I Can Tell Without Even Seeing Them
Anything Will Ferrell is in.
Anything with Adam Sandler. But he can feel free to sing the Hanukkah song year round.
Bruno
Borat
Have any more suggestions for stupid movies let me know, I'll add them, trust me!
Coffee
Music: See Who I Am- Within Temptation
I am not a coffee fan. Nay, I despise coffee. I also despise cappuccinos, frappuccino mocha whatevers, espresso's and basically anything mixed with coffee- ok, coffee cake being the exception but that's more cinnamon anyways. However if I was on a deserted island and coffee was the only thing there I would probably force myself to drink it... and then die.
I am seriously more of a tea drinker. I will drink any flavor of tea you give me (minus the whole sugar induced kind) and I will probably like it.
Now why am I writing a blog on coffee? I went to Barnes and Noble today and on the side of the store there is a little Starbucks area. Granted I have never technically been inside a true Starbucks but I am not that disappointed with it. I see people at college with little Starbucks drinks in there hands all the time and it makes me a bit disturbed seeing people throw $8.00 away like that on a 12 oz coffee. I'm a death by energy drink fan and usually those don't cost me more than $1.50.
BUT ANYWAYS...
Today when I was at Barnes and Noble I was getting thirsty so I bought a square Fiji water bottle and the guy I bought it from handed me a slip of paper which made me find out that Starbucks has a secret menu! 0_o Now I'm sure most coffee/Starbuck's addicts already knew about this but it seems a bit odd to me to make a menu 'secret' and then give it out to five foot tall girls who buy water bottles. Yeah, more than likely that guy is losing his job for handing out Starbuck's secret things to random pedestrians.
But to anyone who is interested here is the secret menu. Have fun.
I am not a coffee fan. Nay, I despise coffee. I also despise cappuccinos, frappuccino mocha whatevers, espresso's and basically anything mixed with coffee- ok, coffee cake being the exception but that's more cinnamon anyways. However if I was on a deserted island and coffee was the only thing there I would probably force myself to drink it... and then die.
I am seriously more of a tea drinker. I will drink any flavor of tea you give me (minus the whole sugar induced kind) and I will probably like it.
Now why am I writing a blog on coffee? I went to Barnes and Noble today and on the side of the store there is a little Starbucks area. Granted I have never technically been inside a true Starbucks but I am not that disappointed with it. I see people at college with little Starbucks drinks in there hands all the time and it makes me a bit disturbed seeing people throw $8.00 away like that on a 12 oz coffee. I'm a death by energy drink fan and usually those don't cost me more than $1.50.
BUT ANYWAYS...
Today when I was at Barnes and Noble I was getting thirsty so I bought a square Fiji water bottle and the guy I bought it from handed me a slip of paper which made me find out that Starbucks has a secret menu! 0_o Now I'm sure most coffee/Starbuck's addicts already knew about this but it seems a bit odd to me to make a menu 'secret' and then give it out to five foot tall girls who buy water bottles. Yeah, more than likely that guy is losing his job for handing out Starbuck's secret things to random pedestrians.
But to anyone who is interested here is the secret menu. Have fun.
New Blogger
Seriously, why?
Why fix something that is not broken? I am not amused. Furthermore now I have to figure everything out again which makes me equally as mad.
Time to look for a new place to blog I suppose, which sucks because this has been the only blogging website which I could fully understand. I have been a member since 2007. This is not facebook. Stop trying to change everything.
Why fix something that is not broken? I am not amused. Furthermore now I have to figure everything out again which makes me equally as mad.
Time to look for a new place to blog I suppose, which sucks because this has been the only blogging website which I could fully understand. I have been a member since 2007. This is not facebook. Stop trying to change everything.
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